August 5th, 2020

 

World in Flames: Fall 2018 Campaign

     “Hurr Blurr"

Roster:

Germany: Austin "The Fuhrer Fury" Obenshain
Japan: Alex Abbott
Italy: Chris "T2" Thompson
Commonwealth: Hight
USA/China: James Frusetta
France/Russia: Tyler Hines
  

Bids:                                                      Final resolution: Allied victory with the surrender of the Axis in Nov/Dec 1942.  

Germany (2)                                               
Japan (0)                                   
Italy (1)                                   
Commonwealth (0)
USA/China (-5) (Whaaat?)
France/Russia (2)

 

 

Sept/Oct 1939: Germany sets up with most of its army in the west on the Belgian and French border. As the turn opens, the Germans push into Poland, take Poznan without loss, and reposition in the west. Could this be the vaunted 'France first' strategy? The Allies take no chances and launch ground strikes on the German line in the west, hoping to disrupt the coming attack. Several German lead units are flipped, but the HQs are both missed. On the next Axis impulse, all fears are confirmed. The weather stays clear and the Germans declare war on Denmark and Belgium. Liege falls without loss and the Germans press forward. Unfortunately for the Germans, they are underprepared for this early two front war, and gaps in the eastern line allow a Polish unit to sack Breslau. The Germans overrun the Polish navy, but it escapes to fight with the Commonwealth. Mid-turn the Germans assault Brussels but the attack goes awry, and the Germans lose an ENG and Mech Div to a single Belgian casualty. The Commonwealth rush units to the area and reinforce the capital. Impulse 7 sees the weather turn sour and the Germans halt operations to test the mettle of the Royal Navy in the North Sea. The battle is a slugfest, with the Germans losing the BC Holstein sunk, BC Schleswig and CAs Blucher, Deutschland, and Scharnhorst damaged. The Brits lose the CA Suffolk and see the BB Ramilles and CA Edinburgh damaged. 
  Meanwhile, the Italians build up on the Egyptian border. Is there some kind of conspiracy against the Commonwealth developing?
  The Soviets see the German move and demand Bessarabia early. The Germans support the claim and then support the Hungarian and Bulgarian claims on Rumanian territory as well. British long range bombers hit Berlin (-2 BPs) and Japanese bombers take 1 BP from the beleaguered Chinese.  
  The Japanese take advantage of overextended Chinese lines and attack in the far north. A low-odds groundstrike flips both units (which were out of supply). The attack is good but not ideal, and the Japanese take one INF loss while killing both Chinese defenders. The Japanese then snake units forward around the flank, flipping a unit next to Lan-Chow, but out of supply and far away from the lines. The Chinese try to respond, but have few resources and units. The Japanese press on all fronts.
  Near the end of the turn the Royal Navy sorties and the Germans blunder into the Brits. The CA Newcastle is damaged while the Graf Spee and Adminral Hipper are damaged for the Germans. The turns with a whimper, but runs surprisingly long (9 total impulses). As the Axis go last, initiative shifts towards the center. The US sends resources to China and occupies Greenland Iceland, but there is no tension.

 

Nov/Dec 1939: The Axis win initiative and elect to go first. The weather is average for the season, so lots of mud. The Germans muster the courage to assault Brussels despite the poor weather and are rewarded with an average result on below average odds - 1 unit lost. But the front grinds to a quick halt. German bombers strike at British factories, but miss. Not wanting the Poles to forget them, the Germans muster up forces and retake Breslau without loss. A cohesive front is once again estbalished on the Polish-German border. The CW repositions naval units and lands more forces in Belgium to support the allies. Italy continues a monstrous buildup in Libya. The Soviets spread out on the Polish border but have not demanded territory in Poland or the Baltic States.
  The Japanese continue their onslaught, assaulting Chang-sha and rolling ridiculously well (an '18') to take it without loss. Media coverage is suppressed, but the war crimes committed there do leak back to the world eyes. The Chinese line looks increasingly precarious. The CW and France send resources from the start of the turn to bolster the flagging Chinese, but their losses are heavy.
  The turns with the Axis again, giving them now consecutive turns with extra impulses. The US passes Selective Service, which finally causes tension, and starts Chinese A/C.

 

Jan/Feb 1940: In a typically poor weather turn, the Allies win initiative but elect to have the Axis move first. The weather is above average - lots of mud and no snow. The Germans seek to take advantage and once again assault Brussels. The City is now packed with British and Irish veterans. The first attack is well done, causing a CW loss to no German losses. Morale remains high, however, and reinforcements are rushed to the area, replacing the loss. The Germans, having used their HQs to reorganize, order their forces forward again. This time the Irish and Scottish lead element bloody the German nose - (3/1) is the result! A CW corps dies, but two Ger INF and an ART do as well. The Germans take our their frustrations on the Poles, crushing Katowicz on a +7 assault without loss and taking the two resource points. The rest of the turn they advance menancingly toward Lodz.
  Italy rearranges its forces on the border of France, mostly pulling troops out and reinforcing Libya yet more. The CW have responded by sending an extra corps, but it looks like fascist aggression will again soon prevail. Won't they ever learn?
  Japan grinds up more Chinese, re-establishing a supply link with a corp that ventured around the northern flank on the first turn of the game. More Chinese die horribly as the Japanese have great ground-striking fortune and execute precision attacks. The Japanese line now stretches from just north of Si-an west to just north of Lan-Chow. The Japanese, having taken Chang-sha, attack and secure the resource point in the forest southwest of the city. Chiang is shattered and there is yet more death. To add insult to injury, the Soviets announce a pact with Japan, securing the Japanese border from interference as they oppress the poor Chinese. Mao has been effectively abandoned by Uncle Joe in Moscow. Emboldened by this, the Japanese use political pressure to close the Burma Road. Again, the US does not seem to care. The Japanese have provoked only a single entry chit thus far (the rape of Chang-Sha).
  France and Britain adjust the line, hoping to hold the Germans in Belgium without bleeding too much. Casualties overall have been high on both sides (CW and German). The French pull in some colonial units, but otherwise await the expected summer German offensive.
  The US send BPs to China (that cannot arrive, but oh well) and then agree to escort in the US East Coast. German subs have sortied, although most of the German navy is currently in drydock. The Scharnhorst was repaired, however, giving the Germans a raiding battlecruiser again, and new subs are being built. The Germans do manage to take 1 BP from Manchester in a night raid. British raids (2 of them) were ineffective.

 

Mar/Apr 1940: The turn arrives with clear weather, but the Axis choose to let the Allies go first in an attempt to preserve summer initiative. The CW and France strike the front lines in Belgium, flipping several German front line units. The Germans attack anyway, but the result is disappointing (-/-).  The Royal Navy sorties in the Med, but the Italians hold their nerve and are not provoked. Tensions are rising, however, and many are speculating that the Italians are itching to join the larger war. The Germans clear the final hexes around Lodz and Warsaw, eliminating two Polish corps SE of Lodz on a +8 assault (rolling an 18). The turn briefly sees some bad weather and the Germans reorganize. The weather then clears and the Germans once again assault Brussells, this time taking more casualties (2/1), but the British defenders are growing shockingly thin. At the end of the turn the Germans also assault Lodz, inflicting grevious losses but not quite taking the city (-/1). British bombing missions take 1 BP from Berlin.
  The Japanese maneuver in China, organizing for an assault on Si-an. They basically spend the entire turn ground striking the 4-1 Gar isolated in the south and Si-an itself. This turn, the strikes fail but the Japanese forces are better arrayed.
  No partisans. The US Gifts destroyers to the CW, causing grumbling from the Japanese who seem to believe that their oppressive and illegal war in China should have no consequences. The turn ends on a whimper with no initiative shift.

 

May/June 1940: The summery weather in April is followed by a season of storms in May. The Allies win initiative despite a request for a re-roll by the Axis. The Allies go first to try and strengthen their line in Belgium. The turn will go long and it will be bloody.
  The Allies, with the initiative, use the opportunity to reinforce Brussels. The Germans are taking losses, but so are the British, who by the end of the turn will have lost several corps, 2 DIVs, a TAC and 2 FTRs just in Belgium. German losses have been similar, with slightly more ground loss and slightly less air loss. The early bad weather makes the Germans think twice, and they wait to renew their western offensive. Instead, they send the subs out in the bad weather to try and find CW convoys. The intrepid mariners, however, are equal to the task, and the subs find nothing. The next impulse, the weather clears. The Allies rally and ground strike the German front lines. They miss the German HQs, but do manage to flip 3 German corps on the front lines, forcing the Germans to reorganize and wait an impulse. The gamble pays off, as the weather again turns sour, delaying the Germans yet again. Another round of naval sorties by the Kriegsmarine yields no contact with CW convoys. Then the weather clears again. The Germans, now face-up and ready, assault Brussels again. The battle is bloody (result is 2/2) and it leaves the CW with, well, not much. The Allies are fearful that the turn will end and then give the Axis first move against a Brussels defended by a single unit. But the turn continues. The CW and the French agree to give the dogged Brits a rest and the French take over the defense of the city. That same impulse the Germans assault Lodz again, killing yet another defender but not taking the city (although they do shoot down the Polish TAC). The British advisors to the Poles then rashly advise a counter-attack to try and kill the German HQ, but the attack goes badly awry despite seemingly good chances for success. Lodz is now fatally weakened.
  With the turn about to end at any moment (on the last spot on the impulse track), the Italians declare war on the French and the British, and then the Axis pass to end the turn. The US takes notice (one chit for Italian DOW). Although this might seem an odd strategy to enter the war and then pass, two impulses previous the Soviets occupied eastern Poland and threatened to break the Nazi-Soviet Pact as their troops surged forward to the border! The Germans rush troops to avoid this potential disaster, narrowly preventing the Soviets from breaking the pact at the end of the turn. 
  Meanwhile, the Japanese enjoy a ridiculously good turn. They successfully ground strike Si-an and then launch a low-odds (+5) attack, but continue to see success on attacks (not having failed one yet), getting a modified '21' and taking the city. Mao is shattered and so is the Chinese line. The Chinese scramble and manage to fall back to the mountain line, but the Japanese not only get an additional resource (and deny the Chinese one), they get breathing room for anti-partisan duties. The constricted front seems more stable now (briefly), but the Chinese are on the retreat. The Japanese cannot control their forces in the victory, and behead an estimated 200,000 innocent Chinese civilians in Si-An, causing outrage in the United States. The US in response not only embargoes strategic materials, they also freeze Japanese assets (no tension on the first, tension on the second). With Italy now in the war, the US has canceled its trade agreement with Italy and is seeking to impose sanctions as soon as possible. The Allies need an arsenal for democracy.

July/Aug 1940: The Axis win initiative despite an Allied reroll, and the Axis start with a bang. The Germans say "genug ist genug" and drop a chit, obliterating the French defenders in Brussels without loss, shooting down another CW TAC and a French FTR to boot. The Germans also clear Lodz and prepare to take out Poland. There is some worry, however, as the Soviets are piling up on the border with nearly enough units to break the Nazi-Soviet pact. The German gamble to split his forces is now starting to show cracks as he does not have enough forces to dominate France and eliminate Poland and keep the Soviets in check. The Italians, newly in the war, elect to surge forward into Egypt and advance slowly towards Alexandria. In the Allied impulse the CW navy sorties to cut supply to Africa, and they are initially successful, sinking the San Giorgio and a CNV point to no losses. A pesky Italian NAV in the eastern Med evades the CW for 5 impulse until it is finally aborted on the last impulse of the turn. On the next Axis impulse the Germans push again in France, but a groundstrike fails and they lose a TAC to the French. More worryingly, a 5:1 attack on Warsaw goes awry, flipping the entire German army in Poland and leaving a single corps still in the capital. Soviet units surge forward again seeking to break the pact. The Germans spend the rest of the turn hurrying units to the east to prevent it (taking combined actions to ferry units over fast enough). The pact remains intact. To make themselves feel better, the Germans crush the Netherlands in impulse 3, killing the defenders and knocking out one CNV. The rest flee to fight with the British. The Italians and the Allies play cat-and-mouse in the Med as the Italians use any impulse when they are in supply to advance. By turn's end, six corps, an ART, and three planes (2 TAC and 1 FTR) are adjacent to Alexandria. The Italian navy sorties into the Western Med to secure supply and there are two rounds of combat with the Royal Navy and some French escorts. The French lose 3 CAs and the Italians 1 CA in some poor Allied naval rolls, but the battle is not decisive. The Italians do conquer A-E Sudan while the British take Somilialand. Two German subs are damaged in CNV raiding. A convoy is lost, but the CW get the chance to repair the lines before the turn ends. The Italians and the Germans both take 1 BP loss to pesky British strategic bombing.
  Meanwhile, back at the Chinese ranch, the Japanese continue their quest to groundstrike every Chinese citizen. They do flip Chiang, but otherwise the front is static as the weather is bad all turn in North Monsoon. Siam is brought into the war as a Japanese ally and the Americans are outraged to learn that anyone would support them. At turn's end the US has Edward R. Murrow and then activates land-based air escorts, the latter of which palpably builds tension.

Sept/Oct 1940:  The Axis narrowly win initiative, but the weather immediately takes a nasty turn (roll of '10'). The Germans reorganize their line on both fronts. The Italians sail out and establish supply to their forces in Egypt. The next impulse the weather clears and the Germans and Italians launch all out attacks. The Germans try a +3 blitz in Belgium that goes horribly awry, causing two quality German casualties. Their attack in Poland, however, goes off without a hitch - if a hitch means no losses and the Germans all flip. The Italians assault Alexandria, but the British are ready for them and the attack causes one Italian casualty and most of the Italian army flips. In the lead up the Italians lose a TAC in combat. On the ensuing impulse, the British take a combined. They find and sink the Duc d'Aosta, cutting the Italians out of supply, The Brits then kill the Italian MECH and the Libyan TER in consecutive impulses. The Italians flee westward. The weather in impulse 5 turns bad again, but the Germans do manage to take a BP from Glasgow. The British reply, taking a BP from Brussels and shooting down a German FTR in the process. The weather clears again partly in impulse 7, and the Germans renew their offensive, attacking into southern Belgium against the French. The brave French hold their ground (1/1 result). German air superiority is beginning to take its toll, however.
  The Japanese seek to gain advantage before attacking in China, but fail their groundstrikes throughout the turn. After some maneuvering, no attacks are made, but the Japanese army has largely reoriented to place its strength in southern China. The US does not take any entry options.

Nov/Dec 1940: The weather starts middlin, but the Germans are feeling testy. They assault and take Warsaw without loss (rolled '18' on +8 assault), finally conquering the Poles. The weather precludes much in the west until the end of the turn. On impulse 5 the weather clears and the Germans blitz the southern forest hex in Belgium, removing the French defenders easily.
  The Brits seek to cut off the retreating Italians and finally locate the Italian NAV maintaining supply. Despite +5 odds in the air battle, the Italians shoot down a 3 point FTR and two CVPs before finally dying at the hands of the last CW carrier plane. Italy decides to reestablish supply to what remains of their forces in western Egypt, and they add insult to injury by brutally surprising the British in the Western Med. When the smoke clears, the CA Kent and Effingham are sunk, the BB Malaya is damaged, and the rest of the fleet is scattered. The Italians lose the CA Abruzzi but take no other losses. The British lick their wounds and abandon the sea zone. The Italians manage to exit Egypt without further losses thanks to their naval action.
  The Soviets, seeing an opportunity, occupy the Baltic States (irritating the US along the way), hoping to build up on the German border and provoke war. The Germans avert disaster with their fortunate attack on Warsaw, so the Soviets miss their chance in 1940 to open a new front against the Axis. Still, the pressure on the Germans to maintain that front is significant and the Soviet army is piling up in Poland.
  The Japanese, envious of the Axis success, launch an offensive of their own in southern China, attacking the resource hex. The ground strike is unreasonably successful (flipping two defenders) but the attack is poorly coordinated - the Japanese roll the dreaded '14' (3/1 losses). The Chinese player breathes an audible sigh of relief. Seeing this bold and reckless behavior, the US decides to Gear Up production and start actually preparing for war.

Jan/Feb 1941: The Allies lose initiative again; the Axis move first. The weather starts out typical for January. The Germans, seeking to restart their western offensive, launch a major attack against the French in poor weather. The resolute French defenders hold, causing the loss of a German ENG. Both the Soviets and the Germans are busy building up directly their mutual border. The Italians shift back west towards Tripoli with the British in pursuit. No naval battles happen, but the Brits do score 2 BPs worth of strategic damage against Milan.
  The Japanese reposition in southern China, but their groundstrikes fail and no attacks are launched.
  The weather presently turns bad ('11' on the chart). Not much happens and then the turn ends. A quick turn. The US finally gains the resolve to resist Japanese aggression and reopens the Burma Road.

Mar/April 1941: Yet again the Axis win initiative and elect to go first. The weather clears world-wide and the Axis set to work. The Germans start with a +8 blitz against the French in Belgium, but once against the stalwart defenders repulse the Germans, causing a MOT DIV loss to one loss of their own. The Germans push more units to the Soviet border as well. Meanwhile the British work to cut off the Italians in Africa, but repeated fail in their attempts to locate the supply lines. They finally manage to cut supply and then invade behind Benghazi, cutting off two Italian corps (including the HQ). At the end of the turn the Brits manage enough impulses to advance forward and eliminate the Italians in Benghazi, clearing the way to Tripoli (+10 blitz succeeds). Some Italian corps escaped, however, leaving the Italians with 3 corps to defend the Libyan capital.
  The Japanese use the clear season in southern China to grind up more Chinese defenders. An early attack nets the forest resource point in China (+9 assault, 1/2S) and a later attack clears the mountain rail line that connects the resource (+8 assault, rolls 16 to complete success at 24). The Americans grumble that the Japanese have made 8 mid-range assaults and only failed one of them.
  At turn's end the Italians push into French Somaliland, conquering it, but no one showed up for the celebratory parade. The Germans take 1 BP from Lyon to reduce French builds.

May/June 1941: The Allies finally secure initiative and take it. The weather, however, reverts to wintery mess for the first impulse. The CW take a naval and move a large fleet with TRS and AMPH into the Italian coast, loaded with troops. The French briefly reorganize their lines and prepare for more expected German attacks. The Chinese are starting to panic, but they still have a line and now there are fewer obvious benefits to renewed Japanese attacks since the loss of the resources in the south. Will China gain a reprieve or will Japan seek a decisive, fatal blow?
  Axis impulse 2 the Italians decide they must defend their homeland and sortie their fleet! A major naval battle ensues, but the CW CVs win the day. One round of combat is fought. The CW loses a CVP to anti-aircraft fire, but the CAs Glorizia and Pola are sunk while the BB Impero and CAs Garibaldi and Bolzano are damaged. The Germans prepare for new attacks in the west and the Japanese start moving their MAR and DIVs to the coast - out of the inland areas of China.
  Allied impulse three sees the CW invade Italy! The brave Brits take a +7 assault on Bari in southern Italy and get ashore. They lose one unit and flip, but the beachhead is established. British bombers simultaneously hit Trieste, taking 1 BP from the Italians. Taranto has only a 1-1 DIV defending it, but the Italians move to reinforce, sending a crack MECH southward and repositioning other forces. The Germans take a +10 blitz in Belgium against the French and smash the French completely, opening the way into France. The next impulse (Axis 6) the Germans indeed take a +12 blitz and smash another stack of French defenders - the Germans are finally in France.
  The turn ends with the British landing one additional corps in Italy to reinforce the beachhead, but no further progress is made. The Italians manage to reinforce Taranto with another DIV, but that is all. The US is oddly quiet at the turn's end.

July/August 1941: The Allies need a reroll but secure initiative. The British start with a naval, and surprise the BB Guilo Cesare, sinking it off the coast of Italy. A major fleet loaded with a MAR and some DIVs appears in the North Sea as well.  Unfortunately for the Wehrmacht, the line is becoming thin with forces having to peel off to do garrison duty in Poland and the French muster up some courage and attack. It is pure success, killing a German INF and MOT DIV and reclaiming the French territory. The Germans, however, take advantage of the clear terrain and blitz the hex west of Metz, killing the two defenders without loss and once again advance forward into France. The Western Front has been exceedingly bloody with plenty of casualties all around.
  In impulse 4 the Germans decide to assault the fortress city of Metz, having extra hexes around it. The attack is yet another bloody affair, but the Germans take the city (2/2 result). The resulting casualties, however, leave the German line again thinned. Two impulses later the French counterattack (+9 assault), killing a German 9-6 ARM in the hex west of Metz. The Germans retain Metz, but they are paying a price for their advances.
  Meanwhile the CW invade the hex just north of Kiel on Allied impulse 3! The attack is a success (no losses going in) despite heavy German air defense. The Germans react but cannot quite get corps into Kiel. So the Brits advance and seize the canal, forcing the German fleet to rebase. The CW ENG races over Denmark, although a German DIV holds Copenhagen. The Brits do not have anything to reinforce the landing, but hold Kiel firmly for the moment. Three German corps have to leave the French front to cordon off the incursion.
  The Brits do land two additional units in Italy and expand a hex, but not before the Italians push their big MECH into Taranto. The Italians seek to provide naval support in case of attack. Italian luck continues to hold as they shoot down the best British FTR (at -3 odds on the AA table...) and then shoot down two CW CVPS in the naval battle. The BB Vittorio Veneto and CA Zara are damaged, however. Seeking revenge, at the turn's end the CW bomb both Italy and Germany. Italy loses 3 BPs over the turn and the Germans lose 4 BPs plus the use of a resource for the turn. The Italians do manage to sink the French CNVs in the Western Med, but the economic damage to the Axis is serious.
  The Soviets build up against the Germans continues and their army on the border is starting to look impressive. It is difficult to imagine that 1942 will not bring yet another entrant into the war.
  The Japanese continue to move units to the coast and near the end of the turn sail out the fleet which relocates from Japan to outlying ports, including Truk. Units and supporting TRS and AMPH are scattered in key locations. The Japanese pull back in the north of China, but the turn ends before the Commies can claim the vacated resource next to Lan-Chow. Tensions with the US seem to be rising, but at the turn's end the US picks no options, content to build. The only item of interest is that the US is heavily fortifying the Hawaiian Islands, which is now loaded with FLAK and Honolulu also has a coastal fort. The turn ends at average length.

Sept/Oct 1941: The Allies desperately want initiative, but despite demanding a reroll the Axis win initiative. The weather stays mostly clear in the Temperate zone (roll of 6, only muddy in the arctic and north monsoon). The weather starts clearish, but general European panic ensues as the Axis realize that the garrison ratio for the Nazi-Soviet pact is has lowered. The Germans rush reinforcements to the Eastern front and forestall a Soviet Declaration of War for the turn. The shift, however, leaves the Germans in France thin and no offensive action occurs in the West for the entire turn. The Italians extend their lines around the CW pocket of Bari and the CW reinforces as well. The Italians bomb Marseilles, taking 1 BP from the French. The Brits take 2 BP from Berlin and another from Essen. The only real action of the turn is when the CW attack Homs to the east of Tripoli, smashing the Italian MOT there. By the end of the turn the CW has surrounded Tripoli.
  The Japanese sail the fleet out to Truk and Canton, and masses of DIVs and MARs spread out in strategic ports. How can the Allies not see this coming? What is Churchight thinking? They should attack Japan NOW and forestall this perfidy. The Chinese reclaim the resource point by Lan-Chow since the Japanese abandoned it. The turn ends with the US embargoing Japanese oil.

Nov/Dec 1941: Tension is palpable as the turn starts with lots of new Soviet units having made it to the border the previous turn. Initiative is rolled: the Axis win the first roll, but on the Allied demand for a reroll, the Allies win. "Uncle Tyler" Stalin opens up with a declaration of war on Germany - he made the garrison ratio with 2 points to spare. The weather first impulse is completely clear. The Soviets make two attacks, both of which take hexes but kill no Germans. The Communist Chinese attack a hex NE of Lan-Chow, but only retreat the unit while taking a loss. The Brits start the turn with an Air Action, but 7 strategic bombing raids ALL fail to land any damage. Morale plummets, but Monty says "Buck up" and reflips half of the bombers. Italy, meanwhile, bombs Marseilles again, taking another BP from France. The Germans counterattack in Poland, killing two Soviet corps and pushing on the southern flank near Lvov.
  Next impulse the weather turns horrifically sour - a '10.' Wailing is heard from the Japanese player - not sure why - as storms set into the South Monsoon. The Germans continue to attack, taking Lvov despite the weather (killing a DIV). The Soviets are out of position because of the weather, but they are rectifying the front. Germany aligns Bulgaria. The CW takes a naval and shifts troops into Kiel and into Italy.
  5th impulse the weather clears somewhat. The Allies land their remaining troops in Italy. The French reposition and move units forward into the Maginot line. The Germans retreat one hex to form a better defensive line in Belgium and continue to harry the Soviets in southern Poland while the north looks like a stalemate.
  But the big news... the perifidous Japanese declare war on the Commonwealth, France, and the NEI! The weather breaks just enough to allow them to wreak havoc. Hong Kong, Tarakan, Balikpapan, Palembang, Rabaul, Malaya, and Singapore all fall to the Japanese. The Japanese use PARA to attack Hanoi, and conquer Indo-China at the end of the turn. Horrors! Fortunately the Americans take notice.
  Not to be outdone, on the final impulse of the game, the CW (having built up finally in Italy) activates Yugoslavia as a minor ally. The Yugoslavs knife into Hungary, taking Budapest and cutting off the Germans and Italians from their Rumanian oil. Simultaneously CW strategic bombing finally hits home, taking 3 BPs from Milan, 2 BPs from Berlin, and 1 from Dresden (actually in the previous impulse, but it reads better here). We have nearly an entire world in flames... The turn ends shifting against the Allies (now +2 Axis initiative), but the Axis in Europe looks precarious even though the Japanese look formidable.

Jan/Feb 1942:  The Axis win initiative, but the weather is poor. Japan starts the turn by militarizing the Marshalls (US has no reaction - staring the Japanese down) and sending out powerful fleets across the Pacific. The British, heavily engaged in the campaigns in Italy and Denmark, are powerless to stop the coming storm. To add insult to injury, the Japanese finally successfully groundstrike the isolated 4-1 Chinese GAR that has been behind the lines for nearly two years. It dies. The Germans perform a strategic retreat in Poland behind the river lines and rush troops to the new southern front created by the entrance of Yugoslavia into the war. The Allies prepare for war and the CW takes a naval, primarily to move troops around, including new troops into Italy. The Soviets press up against the Germans and take several daring groundstrikes, but the German Luftwaffe is up to the task and 3 Soviet TAC are shot down to no loss. The Soviets activate Rumania as an ally.
  On Impulse 3 Japan pulls the trigger and declares war on the US. There is no fleet to speak of in Pearl, so they content themselves to large invasions in the Philippines and the Hawaiian Islands. American patriotism immediately come to the fore as Froosevelt literally pulls out decorations, lights, and balloons to promote the American cause. The US is slow to prosecute/escalate the war, choosing caution, including not sending reinforcements quickly to Europe since they are not yet at war with Germany and Italy. CW strat bombing takes the two remaining oil and 1 BP from Germany.
  More critically, the CW makes two attacks - one that clears Taranto and secure the beachhead in southern Italy and a second that clears Tripoli and Libya. The Italian government now teeters on the brink of surrender as the garrison ratio is close. German units are rushed south to help. The French also contribute, blitzing across the Maginot line in southern Bavaria, killing a German GAR (and taking one loss themselves) and entering on to German soil. The Russians are in East Prussia, the French are in the Bavaria, and the CW have Kiel. The turn ends with the US gearing up and no partisan activity.

Mar/April 1942: Yet again the Axis win initiative. The weather starts clear. The Germans move their new reinforcements to better defensive positions in both the west against France and in the SE against the Soviets, who are pushing slowly into Poland. The Italians juggle troops to keep the garrison ratio. On the Allied impulse the Soviets push southward into Bulgaria and continue to ooze forward in muddy weather against the Germans. The CW takes a naval to set up yet more reinforcements and strat bomb, but the bombing missions all fail. The CW scores one major victory in the Baltic, knocking out the German convoys ferrying Swedish ore over.
  The Japanese solidfy their hold on Luzon and advance towards Batavia in the NEI while playing cat-and-mouse with the US fleet which is now in Pearl in force. The Italians lose a sub to carrier air escorting convoys in the Western Med.
  Yugoslavia's MTN outflanks the Italians in northern Italy and walks into Venice to put more pressure on the Italians. The CW send yet more reinforcements - land and air - into Italy. The garrison ratio is 16-14 favoring the Italians. Close! The turn ends early with the US threatening to expand the war into Europe. One lonely US B-17 makes it way to France. 

May/June 1942: The Allies win initiative. The US immediately declares war on the perfidious Germans and Italians and aligns Mexico to join them in the war. The Allies, bolstered by their new American backing, turn to the offensive in Europe. The CW reinforces both Italy and Denmark. Unfortunately, the attacks there do not go well. A +9 attack on Copenhagen fails (causing no casualties) and maneuvering in Italy produces an attack with no results. Italy craftily remains an Axis power, securing Germany's southern flank.
  The French fare better. A +5 blitz takes them further in Belgium (-/R) and a +6 blitz carries them over the southern Rhine (-/R). A +5 assault fails, causing a single French casualty. The French are building up momentum.
  The Soviets, not to be left out, push forward as the Germans retreat slightly further into Poland to take up better defensive positions. A +10 blitz in southern Poland sees the Soviets move forward again (-/R) but where are the German casualties? A +11 blitz south of Warsaw takes another hex (1/B).
  The Communist Chinese take a +7 assault north of Si-an, but it ends in debacle (3/1) and death.
  The Axis counterpunch. Italy conquers Kenya. Japan kills a PART in China and takes Manilla with a +11 assault that included airborne operations. The Japanese suffer no losses. The Japanese also catch and then sink a fleeing US TRS (needed a '1' to find... and they did!). Grumbling is heard, but the US send more planes to Hawaii, so the US presence is getting stronger. Brazil and Cuba are each added as US minors to the cause. The UK finally gets a good strat hit, taking 3 BPs from Berlin and destroying a factory there.

July/August 1942: The Axis win initiative again, and Germany immediately sets out to re-establish control of the Baltic, moving its fleet out into the 4-box. Later we learn this is for operational defensive shore bombardment, which works well. The Allied onslaught in Europe, however, begins in earnest. The Soviets attack and take Sofia, knocking Bulgaria out of the war. A +5 assault on Konigsberg is costly, but the Soviets seize the city (2/2 result) despite German naval support. The French take an assault on Strausbourg that German air makes only a +3 attack, and the German defenders hold (1/1 result). The Germans retreat again slightly in southern Poland to form a more compact line. This enables them to have operational reserves behind the line and extend their defensive line further southwest. The Germans as a result manage a quick counterattack against the Soviets, killing two Soviet units in northern Hungary. Later in the turn the Soviets pull off a +6 blitz in southern Poland, but the German line remains solid. The Soviets are slowly pushing the German line westward. The French, having reorganized, assault Strausbourg a second time, this time taking the city, again on a (1/1) result. The CW near the end of the turn attack into the northern Rhineland and have great success (-/2S*) on a +7 assault.
  The Commonwealth continue to work on the Italians, but the pesky I-ties thwart the British attempts to knock them out of the war. The Italian air defenses shoot down several British bombers, but at the cost of several FTRs themselves. Late in the turn the CW assaults Milan, killing the lone MTN DIV defender. The Italians manage to avoid capitulation, however, as their southern forces hold.
  The RAF finds significant success this turn in bombing Germany, causing 7 BPs of loss + the loss of an additional resource. The German economy is taking a literal pounding.
  The Japanese, not to be outdone, continue their offensive. They relocate PARA to Borneo and then perform an air assault on the NEI capital of Batavia. The operation is a complete success. Japanese forces realign elsewhere and they clearly are looking to engage the US fleet in battle, but despite everyone's best efforts, no naval battles occur.
  The turn ends with the Italians narrowly staying above the garrison ratio to avoid surrender, but it looks to be only a matter of time. The British did push to the border of Siam and the Chinese advanced a hex abandoned by the Japanese in northern China, but nothing of note occurred. The Japanese look strong and the European Axis players are executing a masterful defense.

Sept/Oct 1942: The Axis win the first initiative roll, but on the insistence of the Soviets, the Allies demand a reroll and win initiative. The turn is mostly shockingly clear and sunny, with clear weather everywhere for the first four impulses. The Allies set to work.
  The US and CW start with a naval, moving troops and planes to various fronts and setting up for operations. The French assault Strausbourg, and take it, but suffer the dreaded '14' (3/1 in losses). The Communists try again on the hex north of Si-an, this time taking it without loss after some amazing tactical bombing with the lend-lease aircraft that has arrived in China.
  On impulse 3 the CW strat bombs a wide area in Germany but the RAF performs poorly. Only 1 BP and 1 res are taken. The French and Soviets are quiet for the impulse, reorganizng troops. On impulse 5 in Europe, the attacks begin in earnest. The CW assaults Copenhagen again on a +8 and it fails again (1/-) . The Soviets takes two attacks, but German air clears in both battles, dropping them to +1 blitzes each, and both attacks fails (-/- and 2/-). The CW attack in northern Italy on a +12 (which would seal Italy's fate...) but it too fails and flips the CW army in the area (1/1 result). But one daring British operation does succeed, as Scotch-Irish paratroopers help secure a +10 blitz just south of Bremen to see armoured elements exploit into Hannover.
  The biggest news comes from the Pacific, where the US and Japanese fleet square off against one another. The Japanese start early, posting a stack of land-based air with a major fleet off of Johnson Island. The US rises to the challenge, sending a major naval force and plenty of land-based air as well. They fail to find each other at first, but on impulse 4 the Japanese and US find each other (no surprise points). The battle in the air is even with the Japanese having more NAV points. The air battle tips slightly in favor of the US, who clears 11 NAV points while the Japanese only clear 7. The CV Bunker Hill is sunk and the BB Mississippi is damaged. The CV Zuikaku and CA Ashigara are sunk while the CV Kaga is damaged.
  The CW do damage a Japanese AMPH in the NEI that same impulse.
  The following impulse, the US search again - and this time it is disaster for the Japanese as they are surprised (1 to 9 on the search rolls...). The US uses most of the surprise to shift the air-to-air combat in his favor, and as a result, the Japanese air forces are mauled a bit. The only Japanese NAV to clear are then shot down by AA. The US forces sink the CV Taiho. The Japanese then abort out of the seazone. The battle could have gone much worse (2 Japanese CVs lost to 1 American CV).
  The turn runs long, and the CW use the added impulse to attack Copenhagen again at +8, which fails miserably (1/-). The Soviets fare slightly better, taking another hex in Poland by blitzing Manstein and forcing him to retreat. The weather finally turns sour and the turn abruptly ends, shifting the initiative back towards the Axis (now are +2 Axis).

Nov/Dec 1942: The Axis win initiative and elect to move first. The weather starts middling, but clears for two impulses. Much action occurs as a result of the unexpectedly good weather.
  In Germany, the Germans attempt to blitz a CW hex in the north, but it fails (1/1) to dislodge the Brits. The Italians counterattack, trying to retake Florence, but it also fails (1/-). A similar attack on Milan only serves to flip Italian units (-/-). One final attack in the southern Apennines kills a CW MOT, but the Italians are all flipped as a refult. The Japanese, however, are more successful. They post an invasion fleet off of the coast of Australia and invade between Canberra and Melbourne! The Japanese marines land without incident. The US and CW (in an unprecedented show of cooperation) rush American and Australian reinforcements in to prevent the conquest of the land down under. They are successful, reinforcing both Melbourne and Sydney. Despite several impulses of trying, no naval combat occurs. Italy managed to conquer Tanganyika. The Japanese elsewhere sink a US TRS and damage the BB Idaho in smaller action in the central Pacific.
  The Italians also seek to cut the Allies's line of supply into Italy, and find some success, sinking a Yugoslavian cruiser and 2 CONV. But the Royal navy finally shows up and the BB Littorio is sunk while the Roma is damaged. The BB Royal Sovereign is damaged in the combat. That opens the way to a final wave of British attacks. Two Italians corps in central Italy are killed along with the German defends of Naples (all without Allied loss). The Italians now cannot hope to keep the garrison ratio.
  The CW also launches attacks in Germany. A +9 assault on Hamburg succeeds (1/2S) and the third time is the charm on Copenhagen, which falls to a +8 attack (-/1S). The German face-down TRS in Copenhagen is sunk while trying to escape. A joint force of Soviet ships and British aircraft sink the remaining German convoys hauling ore from Sweden.
  At the end of the turn (which goes long - 9 total impulses!) Italy is conquered and the soft underbelly of Germany is fully exposed. The Soviets are two hexes from Berlin after a strategic retreat by the Germans, but the CW has forced its way forward also within two hexes of Berlin from the west and north. With troops anticipated to stream up from the south now, Germany sues for peace. Shortly thereafter, the Japanese also sue for peace, giving the Allies a decisive victory.

GAME CALLED end of 1942

 

 

WAR NEWS!

"Germans Attack Poland, Cry 'Oops, Takebacks'" Dateline Berlin. AP Newswire. 7 Sept 1939. After declaring war on Poland and viciously attacking forward elements of the Polish army at Poznan, the Fuhrer Obenshain has apparantly has had a change of heart. No doubt the stiff defense of the valiant Poles caused the dictator to think twice about continuing the conflict, which has now killed thousands of German and Polish civilians. After the initial invasion, crack Polish cavalry units swept around the German southern line and sacked Breslau, causing devastation not seen in Germany since the Great War riots. "We are tired of being the doormat of Europe," said Minister LodZagyswiscz, "It is time our neighbors understood how serious the Polish people are. We will defend our sovereignty!" Germany oddly then declared war on Belgium, seeking an easier opponent. The Belgiques ceded Liege but then stiffened their resistance at Brussels, managing to hold the capital city until brave and just reinforcements from the United Kingdom arrived to support them. The French were there too.

"Rump Nationalist Holdouts from the Long March Disband, Coincides with Japanese Onslaught" Dateline Si-An. Setting Sun Newswire. 10 Sept 1939. Longtime holdouts remaining loyal to Chiang Kai-Shek in the northern part of China, normally a stronghold of communist units under the command of Mao, have finally been disbanded. The units agreed to surrender their arms and return to southern China. Just as this transfer was nearly complete, the Japanese army launched a brutal attack against the now disarmed northern units. Fortunately for the Japanese, the lack of bullets reduced the fighting effectiveness of the Chinese defenders. Japanese casualties are estimated to be only at 40%.  Japanese news sources are claiming a great victory, but the truth must be told.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Soviet Troops Adopt New Motto, Anthem. Port Arthur. Manchurian Candidate News. January 12, 1940. Following the recent decision to avoid confrontation with the Imperial Japanese Army, members of the Soviet High Command adopted a new motto and a new anthem for their army units. Moving on from the old and outdated "Death to capitalists," the Red Army will now have "We bow only to the Japanese" on all of their uniforms and documents. This motto was a significant Japanese demand in the recent non-aggression pact signed by the two nations. Furthermore, the Red Army has adopted a new anthem to represent its recent heroism. An excerpt from the new anthem is printed below: 

"The brave Red army ran away /
The army bravely ran away /
The Japanese Army threatened war /
So the Soviets recalled all their corps /
The Soviets needed boots to lick /
They gave in to the Nippon awful quick /
The bravest of the brave, Red Army!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Japan Declared "Evil" by League of Nations, Expelled from League Dateline Si-an, 3 June 1940. After years of intense fighting in the Sino-Japanese conflict, evidence is mounting that the Japanese are employing weapons and tactics that directly contravene the protocols of war passed by the League of Nations. Japan is a signatory to this accord. Yesterday a brave American reported smuggled pictures out of the Chinese city of Si-an, providing conclusive proof to the world that regular Japanese military units are committing atrocities. Chinese citizens are being forced to serve tea at non-standard hours (one picture clearly shows a clock in the background, indicating that the Japanese are forcing Chinese servants to serve beverages after 9pm and before 11am in direct violation of the Tea Service Act. As our readers will know, the TSA was revised in 1927 to include Saki and similar beverages. The Japanese have no excuse. There were also reports of mass beheadings, torture, and biological experiments being performed on captured soldiers and civilians, but the League rightly took up the more important issue first. Japanese intransigence forced Great Britain to make a motion to censure Japan for violating the TSA, which then resulted in the Japanese insulting the members of that august body. The Indian representative then made a motion to expel Japan, noting that their beverage behavior was "Evil." The resolution was overwhelmingly passed, with only Italy and Japan voting against (although several nations did abstain). The Japanese delegate to the League was heard to say "We will get those pesky Indians..." as he walked out in shame. The issue of some 600,000 murdered Chinese citizens was then tabled for lack of time.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Belgium Waffles! Berlin, Kladderadatsch 18 July 1940. After months of fighting, British forces in Brussels could no longer hold against the might of the German Army and forced their French subordinates to rush to the front lines. Once the wind changed and the Germans realized that Frenchmen were defending the city, it was decided that yet another assault would occur. Rundstedt rallied the troops by saying, "Seventh time is the charm!" and the battle began with German troops advancing once more toward the city. The initial French reaction was to sing "La Marseillaise" as loudly as possible in order to create an emotional diversion. Once the French realized that their anthem was causing many of their own soldiers to flee back to France, they changed tactics by catapulting cattle onto the German lines. German officers had prepared for this medieval method of warfare, however, and had the 9th Anti-Livestock Division take point to combat the bovine bombardment. In what came as a shock to no one except the French, the Germans were able to quickly take the city without loss. Reacting to the victory, the Fuhrer is quoted as saying, "The fall of Brussels sprouts a new wave of optimism in the hearts of the German people.  Give us another year and we'll take Paris!" In celebration of the fall of Brussels, the Fuhrer decided to declare war on the Netherlands; fortunately, German troops did not get clogged in the land of the Dutch and Amsterdam fell within a day. 

Italians Suffer Catastrophic Naval Losses as New French Naval Tactic Proves Its Worth. Dateline Toulon Le Monde 28 July 1940. The pride of the Italian fleet, the heavy cruiser E. Di Savioia, sank with a loss of all hands last night. The clever French naval masterminds fixed torpedoes to the bows of their ships and repeatedly rammed the Italian ship. Although it took the Colbert, the Primaguet, and the Dugouy Trouin, the E. Di Savioia went to the bottom of the sea as the merciless French mariners refused to leave the battle until every last French vessel had had its chance to ram the Italians. "This represents a new high point in French battle tactics," said Admiral Louie "not Nappy" LeSinq. "We have converted our concept of elan to the seas! The world must tremble!"

British Royal Navy Cowers Behind French Allies as the Outnumbered Italian Navy Bravely Reestablishes Supply Lines. Dateline Rome La Travesti del Newso 29 July 1940. In one of the first major sea battles to come in the Mediterranean Sea, the Italian Navy took on a combined French and British Fleet. As the Italian Navy steamed out to reestablish their cut supply lines, the British Navy launched an all-out Air attack, however, they only slightly damaged one Italian ship due to incredible anti-air fire from the Italian fleet. As the planes returned to their carries, the Italian Fleet slammed into the French cruiser screen and suck three French cruisers, the Colbert, the Primaguet, and the Dugouy Trouin. The Italian lost an ancient battle cruiser in the exchange, the E. Di Savioia. The British Navy now seeing there were no ally ships to sacrifice to save their own ships turned tail and ran from the Italian Navy; which allowed them to escape as their goal to reestablish their supply lines was complete. The British Navy, like their army, is showing that their main battle tactics are to sacrifice allied units and then to retreat and flee when the going gets tough.

The Second Great War, One Year Later Berlin, Kladderadatsch 31 July 1940. As the first year of the Second Great War (which, as the Fuhrer predicted, has been "greater" and "war-ier" than the First Great War) winds to a close, we pause and reflect the reasons that we, the righteous German peoples, find ourselves at war. As we all know, the war began when Polish forces, at the behest of their Belgian overlords, crossed over into German territory and sacked the city of Breslau. Not to be distracted by the puppet, the Fuhrer immediately declared war on Belgium. Unfortunately, the British and French were to blind to the scheming ways of the Belgians and decided to declare war on our Germany. Denmark, in her wisdom, decided to join the German cause after some careful deliberation and gentle German persuasion. Breslau was retaken and the Poles immediately fled toward Warsaw, hoping to find some nice places to hide. In its excitement to punish Poland for its aggression, the USSR sent troops so quickly into eastern Poland that they almost tripped and fired on German troops guarding the new German border; fortunately, no bullets were actually fired and the political/military situation in eastern Europe can continue to exist as it currently does without any changes whatsoever. Everything has been fine, everything is fine, and everything will continue to be fine. 

Drumbeat of Another War? Dateline Brest-Litovsk. Pravda 17 August 1940. War between the Soviet Union and Germany edges ever closer as Germany seeks to take Warsaw. The race is on now as to who will declare war first. The Glorious Soviet Union will have success over the dastardly Germans. Meanwhile in the other end of Europe, the war rages on between Germany and the French & English. Germany hasn’t broken the French lines yet as they still try to conquer Belgium. The French are holding strong against the Germans and will not be conquered by the enemy. Viva la France! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

United States whines, moans its way to gearing up. Washington DC (AP) — Public opinion in America backs President Franklin Delano Froosevelt's new armament program, but it's not enough for the beleaguered American president. Thursday, he took to the airwaves, exhorting the Axis powers to do more. "C'mon Germany, Japan" he begged, "Can't you commit some atrocities? Maybe conquer France?"
  FDF rejected the shocked comments of the French and Soviet Press, noting that these were "totally lame" countries whose failure to collapse in the front of the Nazi onslaught was "terrible, just terrible" and preventing America from building a "completely great, just great war machine." Republican leaders in the house questioned Roosevelt's motives. "America has remained a great nation by staying out of foreign wars," Senate Minority Leader Charles McNary (R-OR) said in a rousing speech, "Just how much more will Froosevelt demand we spend on our military?" Froosevelt issued a press directive in response that simply stated "250% as much, next month." "If France and the UK continue to do well," Froosevelt complained early Thursday, "America won't have the chance to turn the war around. Only our Chinese allies, by continuing their continued failure to account themselves well, are helping America." But Thursday evening, Froosevelt changed course: "A failed Japanese attack? Fake rolls. Fake rolls — just not true."
  Following a complaint by the Chinese Embassy, Froosevelt defended himself. "I like the Chinese. Great food. I had it last night. How could I dislike them? Big fan of the bang bang duck. Now let the Japanese bang bang and don't duck, so I can get in the war." 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

European Axis Miss Out on Tasty Treats Canton, China. Delicacies and Donuts. March 18, 1941. Claiming to be "disappointed, but not surprised" by his erstwhile allies' failure to appear at the Axis powers' annual donut summit, Japanese Minister of Munitions and Foodstuffs M. Earl Less-Gassy nonetheless attended and enjoyed the conference in southern China. Major items of business included the approval of experimental fillings for donuts (raspberry and blueberry look like the most promising substances) and the global outlawing of German cookies for not being sweet enough. Both items passed unanimously, with a vote of one in favor and none against. The reason for the Italian and German delegations' absences are unclear, but rumors abound that Italian chefs were among the lead elements captured in British raids on Sardinia, while German food ambassadors were stopped by unarmed French policemen on the Belgian border. 
  In unrelated news, British Prime Minister Winston Churchight has diverted significant resources from Southeast Asia in an effort to boost European pastry production. His goal is to match Japanese treat output by the summer of 1942. Surely this will have no ill consequences for  millions of Bengali subsistence farmers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Brave Brits Close in on Italian Stronghold in Libya. HOMS, Libya. -- Reuters International 16 October 1941. After rebuffing a virtual tidal wave of Italian army units in 1940 and expelling them from Egypt, the Royal Army has driven the fascists back across the desert, past Tobruk, and annihilated a motorised corps in Homs. The plucky Brits along with their Commonwealth allies are now moving to encircle Tripoli and completely cut off the Italians from their Africa possessions. Spontaneous parades have now occurred in cities across Libya, with native Bedouins carrying flags with pictures of teapots. Calling themselves the "Tea Party," these native Libyans are hoping to restore Libya to its pre-Italian roots, ruled by a dictator of their own ethnicity... who drinks tea.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

Diplomatic Disaster in Bucharest! Berlin, Kladderadatsch 19 December 1941. Reports that a meeting between Reich Foreign Minister Ribbentrop and the Rumanian Prime Minister Antonescu went poorly were confirmed today. Antonescu is reported to have walked into the meeting humming the Soviet national anthem and wearing a "Go Reds!" button. Details of the conversation between Antonescu and Ribbentrop could not be confirmed, though some sources have indicated that Antonescu erupted in laughter when Ribbentrop pressed the question of Rumanian entrance into the war as a German ally. The Fuhrer seemed to confirm that diplomatic relations were at an all-time low between the two countries in a speech given last night, in which he said, "The German people have never wanted nor needed the support of the Rumanians! This war will be won for Germany by Germans!" In other news, Deputy Fuhrer Rudolph Hess has not been seen in public for several weeks and is said to be on a top secret mission given to him directly by the Fuhrer. 

RACIST IMPERIALISTS FORCE JAPAN TO WAR. SINGAPORE--Malayan Metropolitan. December 12, 1941. Citing conspicuous and damaging affronts, the Empire of Japan launched all-out, combined arms assaults throughout Southeast Asian and the Pacific yesterday. The United Kingdom, the Dutch government in exile, and France were the primary victims of these attacks, as fortresses and bases from Hanoi to Rabaul, from Singapore to Palembang, fell to the might of the Imperial Japanese Army. These attacks were followed in short order by formal declarations of war. Sources report that British Prime Minister Churchight sat in his office, stunned, for more than two hours after learning of the fall of supposedly impregnable Singapore.
  Alongside the declaration of war, Emperor Hirohito submitted to cabinet members, newspaper offices, and the League of Nations (from which Japan was forcibly removed in June of 1940) a 450-page portfolio detailing dozens of abuses over the last several years. The opening salvo of the document reads, "Despite Japan's victory over Russia in the Russo-Japanese War, its unparalleled dominance over China in the last several years, and its world-class navy, Japan has always been looked down on by European and American empires. That will change now, when Japan begins looking down on French, British, Dutch, and American possessions." The recent embargo of oil and repeated British requests for permission to reinforce their holdings in the Pacific were cited as major stimuli prompting the war. In addition, China's stubborn insistence on existing has signified an aggressive and hostile government in mainland Asia. The Soviet Union's maintenance of a strong garrison on the Manchurian border only further reinforces Japanese beliefs that the Empire is not respected. And the dastardly Indo-British effort to expel Japan from the League of Nations--spies spiked the Ambassador's drink with a "truth serum" leading to irrevocable comments about Churchight's and Dalatyler's mothers--provided ample reason for the Japanese to fight a defensive war in Southeast Asia.
  When asked if the Emperor's comments implied that the United States would be a target of future aggression, Prime Minister Abbottojo replied, "Of course not! As long as the Americans continue to supply the glorious Japanese Empire with oil and strategic materials, we will be the closest of allies. However, if that trade were ever to cease, we would have no option but to take what we need by force." Editor's Note: Trade relations between the United States and Japan ceased in October, when President Frusevelt embargoed all war materials.

UNITED STATES CABINET SHOCKED BY FORTEAN EVENT Washington DC (AP) 14 December 1941 — President Froosevelt and his cabinet were stunned Thursday when an anomalous event of weird and strange meanings disrupted a simple cabinet meeting. "We were discussing how to shift the economy, given Japanese provocation," said Secretary of the Treasury Henry Morgenthau, "When suddenly a rain of excrement fell out of the sky and befouled the White House."
  Residents of the city and government workers confirmed the strange story, noting its unexpected and terrible nature. "My tram was moving down Pennsylvania Avenue," said conductor Chip "Trey" Chadwick III, "When suddenly I heard this noise; I braked and looked out the side window, and I saw a foul rain fall from the sky." Although government officials have refused to speculate as the origins of the odd occurrence, others have been direct. Local street preacher Frederick Phelps harangued crowds for hours after the event, pronouncing that "God hates America" for its failure to stop the "godless Communists" and their wicked ways. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jesus Returns, Pigs Fly, Winter Storm Strikes Hell, Pacific Allies Prove Competent. 7-14 Sept 1942. Geneva (AP) — In a stunning turn of affairs, Jesus Christ returned to earth, enrapturing Christians everywhere. The Lamb of God appeared above Jerusalem, accompanied by angelic multitudes. There, they did battle with a flock of flying boars, which apparently sought to forestall the almighty. Feathers and fried pork products rained down on local observers.
            Possibly in related news, demons erupted out of the Krubera caverns in Soviet Georgia. In many cases these foul imps were covered in ice and suffered from frostbite. Locals report waves of chill and icy winds emanating from the cave, which locals have long known as the Path to Hell.
            From the Pacific War, reports have come in that the Chinese and Americans proved competent. Chinese troops pushed back the Japanese near Si-An, to the stunned amazement of local peasants. “I couldn’t understand what they were doing,” said local woman Wang Fang. “They seemed to be running away in the wrong direction, towards the Japanese lines. Then, suddenly, the Japanese were defeated.”
            “Also, the people who died were wearing the wrong uniform; you know, the one with the red dot on it. I haven’t seen Chinese soldiers wearing those before.” She adds, “it was very confusing.”
            In the central South Pacific, the Japanese Navy was reportedly set back when America allegedly dealt their navy a heavy blow. Admiral Austinabe reportedly admitted that he had underestimated the Americans. “Their planes were able to take off from their carriers,” the commander explained, “and in no few cases, able to land again.  All of their surface fleet sailed out right-side up, and only a couple proceeded to the battle backwards and in reverse. This is a level of competence we have not seen before from the Americans. It confused us so greatly, we were not able to strike them down.”
           Normalcy returned with the news that the USAAF unleashed its fiercest strategic bombing flight yet, pulverizing a duck pond in southern Germany. With this display of American ineptitude, no doubt inherited from their British forefathers, many in Europe know that fantastical tales of the rapture, flying pigs, and Allied gains in the Pacific are just tall tales.

Copenhagen Must Die! Dateline Aarhus, CW HQ, 19 Oct 1942. Reuters. After months of fierce fighting in Denmark for control of the Skagerrak and access to the Baltic Sea, brave Commonwealth soldiers entered the outskirts of the capital city of Copenhagen three months ago. There desperate German units have put up a surprising defense, withstanding waves of assaults and bombing. "This is the lynchpin to the war," said Brig. General Wayne "Stalwart" Flibbert. "We take Copenhagen, and basically we win the war." When pressed to explain why the Reich would surrender after the loss of the Danish city, the general simply remarked that it was "obvious." General Flibbert has made urgent requests for more more men and materiel, but most of the attention of the army has been focused on Italy. "Leave the bloody I-ties be, I say," said Flibbert, "and put our might where it belongs - in Denmark!" General Flibbert accounted for the Royal Army's repeated failures in Denmark by noting how the Germans "clearly saw the strategic importance of this theatre." "Why else would the Germans have reinforced the city if it were not vital?" General Flibbert asked this news service to join him in a rousing cheer: "Copenhagen must die!"