Germany: 0 (10)     USSR/France: 3 (16)
Japan: -6 (-1)         USA/China: 4 (21)
Italy: -4 (-4)           Commonwealth: 3 (22)
  

Results at end of Game Report (4 May 2016)

General result: Axis Tactical Victory

The Soviet player David Hart watched as James Crandall examines the East Front in Europe.

CW player Ryan Gale tries to look thoughtful.

The "Last Hurrah" WiF Group (L to R): James Crandall, Alex Abbott, David Hart, Maryska-Connolly Brown,
Logan McDonald, Robert Castle, Ryan Gale, Auberon Croker. Not pictured: Tyler Hines, Jacob Clayton,
Reuben Retnam.

Logan and Maryska review Western Europe while David pushes the Soviet horde forward.

Sept/Oct 1939: Germany declares war on Poland and destroys everything, including all the aircraft, for the loss of a single INF unit. Third impulse Germany takes Denmark as well. The weather does turn sour mid-turn, slowing a German redeployment to the west, however. Italy takes an opening and declares war on the CW and France in impulse in order to surprise Malta, seizing it without loss. The CW and French navies sortie, but fail to catch the Italian fleet. They do manage to sink one CNV and the CA Fiume as well as damage the fast Italian TRS. The Italian subs strike back, sinking 1 French and 4 CW convoys, lowering the CW build first turn. Overall, the Italians feel pretty good about the exchange and now have their main fleet based at the strategic island. Britain moves to defend Gibraltar, reinforces Egypt, and port strikes the Germans, claiming 2 CNV points. Russia redeploys Zhukov and other units from Siberia to the Persian border and rumors abound of another secret pact involving the Soviets, who also revealed a pact with Germany, seizing eastern Poland. In the Pacific, Japan loses a resource point in the north to the Communists, but retakes the hex, killing the Lanchow militia. At the end of the turn, Japan and the Soviet Union announce a pact. Here is the official pact:

Pact of Neutrality between the Greater Japanese Empire and the

Union of Soviet Socialist Republics

The Greater Japanese Empire (hereafter “Japan”) and the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (hereafter “the USSR”), agree to the following provisions (hereafter “the Pact”):

1.      A neutrality pact, effective immediately, to be maintained by the “Chit System;”

2.      Upon the USSR coming to war with the Imperial State of Iran (hereafter “Persia”), the USSR will begin shipping one oil per turn to Japan, with the following conditions, the failure to meet any of which will result in the immediate dissolution of the Pact:

a.       Japan will be responsible for providing the convoys necessary to fulfill oil shipments,

b.      Persia will be aligned to Japan’s Sphere of Influence,

c.       Japan will not send any peacekeeping forces to Persia to prevent its conquest by the USSR, and

d.      Japan will not send any peacekeeping forces to any minor country attacked by the USSR in order to prevent the minor country’s conquest; and

3.      The USSR may join any previously existing embargo of Japanese trade, thereby cutting off oil shipments to Japan, without breaking Clause 1 of the Pact.

Done in Vladivostok on October 30, 1939.

Nov/Dec 1939: The Axis win initiative but the weather turns foul and remains so for most of the turn. The Germans slowly push west, building up on the Dutch and Belgian borders. The Italians struggle to send troops to Libya and lose a TRS and 1 CNV to naval battles. A German naval sortie fails to locate any convoys and the British start to repair and improve their convoy lines. China is mostly quiet, but there is a fair bit of movement of Japanese corps. The turns ends without much fanfare. The US interns the Bearn despite protests from the French and an aircraft licensing deal is struck allowing the Chinese to manufacture their own aircraft.

Jan/Feb 1940: The Allies win initiative and elect to move first. The British reinforce Gibraltar and Egypt and land another corps in northern France. The French are oddly set back from the border, but start to rush forward as the Germans attack the Netherlands. Holland falls without loss to the Germans. At the end of the turn despite the bad weather, the Germans surprise the Allies, attacking Belgium. The attacks come off without a hitch, gutting the Belgians. The Allies now fear a dreaded double-impulse if the Axis win initiative in March, since the French line looks unprepared. The Brits managed to damage and scatter the Italian Red Sea flotilla, securing the flank of Egypt. In the Pacific, the Japanese finally launch an offensive in southern China, but both attacks fail with minor losses on both sides. The US passes a trade bill allowing resources to support the Chinese fight against the Japanese, and an oil deal with the Burma fields seems imminent.

Mar/Apr 1940: The Axis win initiative and the dreaded 'double impulse.' Germany uses the advantage to advance through Belgium unopposed and hit the French line, punching a hole. The weather is muddy, however, and the advance is slow. Germany also assaults Lille, and takes the city with heavy casualties, losing an INF and a PARA in the battle. The Allies steadily retreat in France, just managing to hold the line.  By turn's end the German line has advance several hexes into France. Italy advances in Egypt, although they lose two nice TAC to British FTRs in the area. The British lose another CVP and pilot, but manage to reinforce Egypt with more corps. The fast Libyan territorial takes Tunis unopposed while the AOI territorial slowly pushed into A-E Sudan. In the Pacific Japan resets and attacks a coastal hex next to Canton again. This time they take the hex, but take two casualties in the process. The line in northern China bends back, although no combat occurs as the Chinese rationalize their line. The Soviets build up appreciably on the Persian border. Persian appeals for international help go unheeded, especially in light of the news of the Japanese-Soviet Pact. The Soviets claim the Baltic States and the US seems uninterested. At the end of the turn the US occupies Iceland and Greenland, declaring them hostility free zones.

May/Jun 1940: The weather clears and the Allies win initiative, but they seem uninterested in seriously resisting the German advance. Instead, the British again reinforce Egypt, hoping to stop the Italian advance. The Germans slowly chew through the French lines, failing only in a single attack on the French armor east of Paris. By the end of the turn the Germans have two hexes of Paris and have broken the entire Maginot line. The end seems near. The Italians and Commonwealth continue to wrangle in Egypt and over the control of the Eastern Med. The British end the turn cutting the Italians in Africa out of supply, but they lose the BB Ramillies and two CAs in the process to no Italian losses. The front is stuck just outside of Alexandria on the ground. Italy conquers A-E Sudan. The Soviets declare war on Persia, easily conquering the nation in three impulses and then start moving units west. In China the Japanese are slowly advancing, but mostly not by attacks. The Chinese line is solid in the north, but the Nationalist line is thin at points. The US takes no actions. The turn goes quite long, helping the Axis cause in France.

July/August 1940: The Allies win initiative and win again after the Axis demand a re-roll. The weather is of course brilliantly clear and the Germans continue to grind away at the French, this time swinging south to destroy more of the French army. By impulse 6 the Germans have four hexes around Paris. In impulse 8 the final assault comes and the Wehrmacht overwhelms the defenders. Paris falls. There is some cost as the valiant French air force shoots down the best German TAC in the previous battle. In the Med the Italians pick off another CW cruiser, but their attempt to supply Egypt goes awry. Despite heavy air superiority, the British carriers shoot down an Italian NAV and abort two other planes to solidly wrest control of the area again. The Italians have the CA Pola damaged and a lone German Me-110 guards the supplies to the Axis forces that still sit outside of Alexandria. In China the Japanese break the line, splitting the Communists in the north from the Nationalists in the south just west of Wuhan. Panic ensues but the Chinese manage to repair the line before the Japanese can advance on Chungking.

A late turn naval battle in the Western Med results in the loss of the CA Pola for the Italians, but the Italians sink the CA Southampton elsewhere in retaliation.

     At the end of the turn the US elects to escort in the East Coast. Germany installs a Vichy government. Morocco and Algeria, French West Africa, Indo-china, the Asian map territories, and the 'others' go Vichy. Syria, Madagascar, the Pacific territories, and Equatorial Africa go free. The new Free French government relocates to Middle Congo.

Sept/Oct 1940: The Japanese align Siam and reposition in China. Not much otherwise happens as the weather is poor the entire turn. In Europe Germany seeks to beat the Soviets to the punch and declares war on Yugoslavia, activating the Rumanians to join them. The weather is poor, however, and not much actually happens. The Axis have to rely on the Italians to get a corps into Yugoslavia to avoid a lapse of war. The Germans try to raid British convoys, but they find nothing until the next impulse when a CW hunting fleet runs into them. The CW loses two cruisers, but the Germans lose the CAs Admiral Hipper, Graff Spee, and the Deutschland. The German navy limps home to lick its wounds.

Nov/Dec 1940: Germany starts the turn by activating Hungary, allowing them to continue to press into Yugoslavia. They take Zagreb without loss. The Wehrmacht spreads out across France, but significant forces stream east to the Soviet border. Italy gets bucky, sinking the CA Exeter and then invading the out of supply Cyprus. The British retaliate in the Western Med, sinking the Abruzzi and damaging two other cruisers. BW bombing starts, taking 1 BP from Dusseldorf.

The Japanese resume their perfidious ways. Mid-turn they catch the Chinese by surprise, occupying Indo-china (but offending the US while doing so) and sending troops to Hanoi, who promptly march north around the end of the Chinese line. Kunming and the 3 stored oil there fall to the Japanese. The Japanese army, heady with victory, runs amok causing an international incident (failed the US entry city roll). The turn is surprisingly mild with good weather for the first  impulses. The turn runs fairly long (10 total impulses, 5 each side) before ending with a whimper.

Jan/Feb 1941: Turn starts with the Allies winning initiative, but forcing the Axis to move first. The starting weather is horrible, but the Germans take advantage of the weather to raid CW convoys. Between the Germans and Italians, 7 cps are lost, resulting in 4 lost production points for the CW at the end of the turn. The weather clearly somewhat and the Germans use the break to conquer Yugoslavia and activate Bulgaria as a minor ally. The turns on the Axis impulse, shifting the initiative marker and rewarding the Allied ploy. Germans units continue to stream eastwards toward the Soviet border. The Japanese have a quiet turn, shifting units and stretching the Chinese line, but some movement of units to rear echelon areas also takes place. The newly conquered Yugoslavs rise up in rebellion, with partisans taking to the mountains in southeast Yugoslavia. There is a rumor of a charismatic leader among them named Tito.

Mar/Apr 1941: Stinging from the convoy losses, the Allies win and take initiative. The Germans kill the Yugoslav partisan (without loss) and continue to push east with more troops. The West Wall looks slightly denuded. The Brits bomb occupied France, taking 2 BPs from Germany. The German economy is still the largest in the world, however, despite the bombing. The Italians catch the Brits by surprise in the Western Mediterranean, but superior British armor plating limits the British losses to a single sub sunk and several ships damaged. The Italians lose a CNV and the BB C. DiCavour. At the end of this relatively short turn, the US Congress authorizes the relocation of the Pacific Fleet from San Diego to Pearl Harbor.

May/Jun 1941: Allies win initiative and the weather is clear. On the Axis impulse everyone breathes deeply - but the no declaration of war is made. Instead, the Germans waits until their second impulse and then declare war on the Soviet Union, pulling Finland into the war as well. Both actions irritate the US, and populr opinion builds against the Axis. The Germans use a chit on a super-combined for the air and naval moves. The Commonwealth loses 4 CNV, a cruiser, and has two cruisers damaged in the combats. The Germans initially do well, clearing Poland and pushing into the Baltics. The next impulse, however, sees the weather turn muddy, slowing the Germans down and saving the Odessa pocket in the south. Two Russian factories (Odessa and Kiev) are dismantled and sent to Siberia. The Italians contribute to the convoy attacks and seek more battle in the Med. The BB Guilio Cesar is damaged. Italy conquers Kenya in Africa and the Germans liberate Latvia and Lithuania. Italy finally manages to put the Brits out of supply and attacks Alexandria at +8, killing the ENG div but not taking the city. The turn goes long but the Germans bog down outside of Kiev and Odessa in the south, and push up near Pskov and Minsk in the north. The Japanese reposition their fleet, moving it to Truk. Japanese troops are mysteriously appearing all over the Pacific and they are withdrawing from some parts of China.

July/Aug 1941: The turn is short - only 8 total impulses - much to the chagrin of the Germans (but the Japanese seem oddly happy about it). The Germans make progress against the Soviets, taking Kiev and encircling Odessa in the south. In the north the attack remains slow. They take Minsk with a daring blitz attack, but the Soviets counterattack and reclaim the city right before the turn ends. Three more Russian factories (Dnepropnevsk, Kursk, and Vitebsk) head to Siberia. The Soviets also reveal major fortifications between Leningrad and Novogorod, planning for a defense in depth. Soviet subs surprise German ore convoys from Sweden, sinking two of them, but the Germans repair the line before the end of the turn. In the Med Italy assaults Alexandria again, this time taking the city (without loss). The Commonwealth line is now thin in Egypt. There are more small naval skirmishes, and the Italians lose the CA E. Di Savoia with the Duc d'Aosta damaged. Japan continues to arrange its forces in a provocative manner. The US is sufficiently alarmed that they gear up at the end of the turn.

Sept/Oct 1941: Axis win initiative and elect to go first. The Italians invade and take Port Said, closing the canal and further weakening the British position in Egypt. But the Brits are not done yet and send in Indian reinforcements to stabilize the area. Germany continues a slow advance into Russia, taking Kiev and breaching the river line but not pushing far beyond. More troops are sent to deal with the British incursion into Denmark. Despite many attempts, the Allies and Russia fail to find the Germany convoys in the Baltic. Italy take Uganda in Africa (world yawns) and sink the CW CA Liverpool. In China the Japanese try to rationalize their line and assault Nanning, but fail on the dreaded '14' (3/1 losses). CW strategic bombing is still weak, but they manage to deprive the Germans of a resource point in the Netherlands. At the end of the turn the US imposes an oil embargo on Japan, which also triggers the cessation of oil from the Soviet Union to Japan as well. The Japanese are incensed and much saber rattling commences.

Nov/Dec 1941: The Allies win initiative even after a reroll demanded by the Axis. The Chinese move to stabilize their line, which is easier since the Japanese seem to be pulling back to shorten their own lines. Germany manages to take Tallinn in the north and finally completely encircles Odessa in the south. On the first impulse the Japanese navy sends a powerful task force which circles around off the coast of the Hawaiian islands. In response the US sends out its CVs in Pearl. Next Axis impulse the Japanese strike, declaring war on the US, CW, and NEI. The port strike on Pearl is a lesson in American good fortune, as he improbably manages to survive all but one of the kill/damage rolls. BB North Carolina is sunk, with the BBs Idaho and New Mexico damaged. The CAs Northampton, Chicago, and New Orleans are also damaged - but the over all damage is light. The Japanese fare much better in the rest of the Pacific, however, taking Rabaul, Midway, Wake, and Guam in the Central Pacific. Japanese forces take Hong Kong and Malaya as well. Troops land on the oil resources in the NEI except Palembang, where they land near. The Japanese also surprise the Brits, conquering Ceylon and taking the strategic port in the Seychelles. Commonwealth communication lines to Egypt now look threatened. Germany mid-turn drops its second chit to take out Odessa, which it does without loss despite the snowy weather. The turn ends with the Germans repositioning in southern Russia and advancing towards Pskov in the north, but progress in the poor weather is slow. The US try to attack Japanese convoys with a large sub force, but no convoys are found.

Jan/Feb 1942: The Axis win initiative and the Allies do not demand a re-roll. The weather is predictable muddy and snowy the entire turn, with no extremes. The Japanese play conservatively in the eastern Pacific, keeping a huge reaction fleet in Truk, but they shuttle troops around in the west. A sizeable fleet seeks to cut off British supply to Egypt. After an initial failure the Japanese do manage to break the supply chain leaving the Brits defending Egypt on their own. The Germans and Italians take advantage, striking Wavell in the port of Suez and then attacking, blitzing successfully into an undefended Cairo. Egypt is conquered and the Axis set to repairing the canal. Pockets of British troops remain in Egypt, but some Italian forces start moving towards Palestine and Transjordan at the end of the turn. In the USSR Germany has two great successful attacks clearing obstacles in the south despite the weather. Then an ill-fated attack involving paratroops fails to secure Dneproptevsk, causing heavy casualties (Para corps, para div, and a MECH to the loss of one Soviet MIL). In the north the Germans surround Pskov, which looks doomed. A rogue Soviet CAV manages to cause brief supply problems south of the Pripets, but the Germans regroup. The Eastern Front looks to be balanced, but the Soviets still hold Minsk which gave them a big boost. For the first turn of the game, the Soviets outbuild the Germans. The Brits try again to find the Swedish ore convoys, but fail. A few more troops land in Denmark, but nothing really happens. Italian subs decimate one convoy line in the Cape Verde area which, when coupled with convoy losses to the Japanese, lowers the CW build by nearly a quarter. With Egypt nearly secured one wonders where those forces will head to next! The Japanese reinforce their beachhead on Luzon, secure Malaya, and continue to secure the Palembang oil area. Oddly, Japanese forces are building up on the border with the Soviet Union near Vladivostock. The turn ends on the Axis impulse, shifting initiative towards the Allies.

Mar/Apr 1942: The weather turns sour and the turn is short (2 impulses each side only). The Allies win initiative after a re-roll. The Commonwealth chooses to take a land and shore up defenses in Egypt and India, but to little avail. The Italian conquer Palestine and start reducing the pocketed Commonwealth troops. Worse yet, the Axis on their impulse elect for naval sorties, sinking 7 CW convoys and three heavy cruisers, including the Newcastle, the York, and the Glasgow. The foray is costly, however, as on the last Allied impulse the British navy finds the German fleet, sinking the Bismarck and the Blucher. The Eastern front is mostly stagnant in the bad weather, with the Germans making small progress around Kiev and encircling Pskov in the north. In the Pacific the Japanese play conservatively against the Americans but use their free hand in the Indian Ocean to distribute troops. As a result, the US sneakily retake Midway from the Japanese. More corps land in the Philippines and oddly troops are redeployed around the Chinese theatre, with marines and other troops being positioned near Russia. There is a clear buildup of forces in Manchuria on the Soviet border.

May/June 1942: The Allies win initiative despite the Axis asking for a re-roll. At the start of the turn the US declares war on Germany and Italy, with the measure passing Congress with ease. The Americans also take the opportunity to land in the Marshall islands, seeking advance airbases. In their own impulse the Japanese reveal their hand, declaring war on the Soviet Union. Japanese forces land in Persia and a major force invades directly into Vladivostok, taking the city without loss. The Soviets were caught essentially unprepared, having focused all of their attention on the Germans.  A peace accord is likely in the works, which will probably deny the Soviets a factory and three resources while giving the same to the Japanese war effort. The results of the Persian expedition are as yet unclear. Meanwhile, back in the Levant, the Italians advance into and conquer Syria from the Free French. Diplomatic pressure has been mounting on Iraq to join the Axis cause. Allied strategic bombing picks up in earnest, taking 4 BPs and 2 resources from the Germans. The Allies also hit the Baltic, sinking 5 convoys in total before the end of the turn. One German sub is sunk in the North Atlantic to minor Allied convoy losses. The Japanese sneak in to Dutch Harbor in the Pacific. The British are still under-building, in part from an oil squeeze as they struggle to put their convoy lines into proper shape. At the end of the turn Italy activates Iraq as a minor ally and the USSR and Japanese come to an accord. The turn runs unusually long (12 impulses!). Soviet partisan cause havoc, taking Kiev and Odessa at the turn end, threatening the German supply lines.

July/Aug 1942: The Allies win initiative and use it to set up for some interesting quick moves. The British invade Tunisia, taking Sousse before marching north to kill the 1-4 Libyan territorial there, liberating Tunisia. Perhaps this is a new airbase for the Allies in the Med? Italy meanwhile DOWs Yemen, invades, and uses the maneuver to walk into Aden unopposed. Germany finally manages to take Pskov (without loss) and clears the north for new operations. In the south, however, a counterattack on Kiev (held by a partisan, a corps, and a DIV) fails with heavy losses. In the subsequent impulse the Germans rally and hit it again, this time taking the city without loss. Nonetheless, the Germans lose two clear weather impulses dealing with rearward issues. Mid turn Allied bombing takes 3 BPs and 1 res from Germany. In the Pacific the Japanese reinforce Dutch Harbor and the US comes to hit the force, but no combat occurs. The Japanese retaliate by finding an sinking a loaded AMPH (with the 1st MAR) along with the CAs Houston and San Francisco in the Marshalls.

  Near the end of the turn the Germans assault and take Minsk on a +11 attack, succeeding without loss. The Russians seek to inflict some punishment by attacking a lightly held Kursk, but the attack goes awry and two Soviet corps bite the dust. Near the end of the turn the US finds and sinks the CA Ashigara in the Bering Sea, but otherwise the Pacific is calm. The turn goes long, finally ending on the Allied impulse and shifting initiative back to neutral. 

Sept/Oct 1942: The axis win initiative after asking for a reroll and the weather starts bright and clear. The Japanese send a major fleet into the Solomons and the US answers the challenge. In the first battle of the Solomons the Americans make hay, sinking the Shokaku and the BB Haruna to the loss of only the Lexington damaged. The US manages to pass every defensive roll against the Japanese. But the Japanese regroup and in their next impulse strike back. In the second battle of the Solomons the Americans suffer serious surprise and their luck finally breaks. They take the worst of the air battle and then the Japanese bombers do their worst, sinking the CVs Enterprise and Saratoga, and the CA New Orleans. The CA Chester and CV Ranger are damaged to no non-air losses for the Japanese. In addition the Japanese sink 4 CW convoys, breaking the Austrialian-Canada line. Not to be outdone, the Germans resume their offensive in Russia, assaulting and taking Kharkov and munching two more stacks of Soviets in the Donetz basin, nearing Rostov. In the north the Germans advance to Smolensk and finally form a line in front of Leningrad. Surprising the British in Denmark, the Germans also take a +8 blitz that succeeds in Denmark, destroying a CW ARM and MECH without loss. For their part, joint US and CW forces from Tunisia advance on Tripoli and now have three hexes on the city. The Italians attempt a few sorties in the Western Med, but despite several tried no combat occurs and the Allied buildup in N. Africa is now significant. Meanwhile, despite four turns of nonstop ground striking the last hold-outs in Egypt (two Indian corps) remain out of supply but face up in one the longest streaks of failed ground strikes this commentator has ever seen. Germany has the Austrian oil destroyed (and repairs it immediately) and China loses 1 BP in Chang-sha to Japanese bombers. Japan assaults Manila and fails, killing the TER.

Nov/Dec 1942: The weather turns sour and the turn is short. With weather rolls of '12' and '10' not much moves anywhere, excepting the Philippines, where the Japanese assault Manila again and take it, conquering the Philippines. The Russian front is fairly stable. The Allies make one attempt at taking Tripoli, but the attack fails (1/1) and the Italians manage to reinforce the city at the turn's end by an AMP that was at sea and ready to relocate there. The Soviets are starting to have a reasonable force in central Russia, but the Germans still have operational initiative. The Allies are slow to build except in Africa, and little happens in Denmark. The turn ends with a whimper as 1943 looms.

Jan/Feb 1943: The weather starts off reasonably nice and the Germans use the opportunity to munch a few Soviet units in the north, clearing the path to Smolensk. Next impulse they assault the city, but a mass of Soviet bombers fly in to lower the odds. The price was high (Soviets lost 4 TAC in the air combat) but the city held, costing the Germans an ENG and INF. Italy at long last successfully groundstrikes the last CW holdouts in Egypt and clears the desert. As they do so, however, a joint CW-American force assaults and takes Tripoli in Libya with the help of some serious shore bombardment. The under belly of Europe looks inviting. Italy responds by declaring war on Saudia Arabia, seizing the oil and taking Riyadh in an assault without loss. The Pacific is fairly quiet. The Japanese invade Johnson Island near the Hawaiian islands and pick off more CW convoys, but there is no other action for the turn. The CW is down in builds as an Italian TER cuts the rail line from S. Africa to the Congo. The Japanese strategically comb Chang-Sha, taking a build point. The summer approaches....

Mar/April 1943: The axis win initiative and the Allies do not ask for a reroll, keeping the +2 initiative. The turns starts reasonably clear and the Germans use the weather to assault and take Smolensk (without loss). The rumbling mass of gray then spends the rest of the turn pushing up near the new line, which runs just outside of Moscow south through Tula. Additional Axis units push East. Denmark continues to be a non-issue. The Allies are starting to become more active in the Med. A port strike damages the Andrea Doria in Malta and the Allies reorganize in ports in Libya and Tunisia. In the Pacific the Japanese sink a CW TRS and damage the CA Kent, but the Americans return the favor in a major naval battle. Despite losing a few FTRs the US sinks the CV Kaga and loses no shipping. The victory, however, does not slow the Japanese, who are expanding in the Indian Ocean and pushing towards Australia. The weather turns sour and the turn ends early, with each side getting two impulses.

May/June 1943: The Axis win the first initiative roll and the Allies demand a reroll, but lose a second time. The weather starts clear and the Germans again go on the offensive in Russia. An attack on Tula fails after Soviet TAC clear (Germans lose a PARA) but a blitz between Dnep. and Stalino succeeds, cutting the Soviet forces there in two and threatening the Crimea. The Soviets respond by launching an unexpected combined air/land invasion on Varna in Bulgaria, threatening the Rumanian oil fields from the south. The attack succeeds. Meanwhile, the Allies spend the first impulse massing a huge fleet in the Western Med, but that turns out to be a diversion as the following impulse American paratroopers attack near Venice! The attack goes awry however (a '5' on a +9 assault) and fails. In the naval battle leading up to the attack, the CW loses the BBs Rodney and Howe to Italian NAVs. Italy starts pulling troops back to the home country in preparation for an attack. A major strategic bombing raid takes one oil point from the Germans. Meanwhile, the Pacific starts to heat up as well. Japan declares war on Free France and invades Madagascar. They also take Batavia, conquering the NEI, and land marines near Darwin. With the help of partisans in Burma, the Japanese secure the oil in Burma, further strengthening their cause. There is no visible CW reaction to the Japanese advances as they are happy to defend India. The Japanese also strategically bomb Si-an, removing one build point. The turn surprisingly ends at the earliest opportunity (the first '1' on the die to end the turn), leaving the Germans in a tough spot, since Rumania is threatened by the Soviets invading from Bulgaria. There is some worry about a lost opportunity with the breakthrough in southern Russia as well. The Japanese seem ebullient while American morale took a hit with the daring but failed air assault in northern Italy.

July/August 1943: The Allies win initiative and the Soviets use the opportunity to take Bucharest, threatening to remove the Rumanians from the war. The adventure goes wrong, however, when a relief force arrives under Rommel and systematically kills all of the Soviet units and retakes what was lost. Rumania is saved and elects to remain in the war. The Germans decide to add the Rumanian forces to the build pool. The action on the Eastern front is heavy all turn long. The Soviets counterattack just north of Kursk, killing a German MECH and MECH div and threatening a breakout, but the punch is too weak and the German repair the line. Meanwhile the Germans hit back in the south, assaulting and taking Stalino and setting up for a major assault on Dnepropetrovsk. The Germans have nearly cleared the Dnieper basin, freeing forces to push east towards the oil fields.
  In the Med the Allies start the turn setting up a large force in the Western Med. Next impulse they declare war on Vichy (making it hostile) and invade near Marseilles. The Italian airforce (with some German support) swarm out into the Med. In two consecutive impulses the Axis find and surprise the Allied fleet, sinking the BB Arkansas, CA Louisville, two TRS and one AMPH. On the boats Alexander (CW HQ and a CW MOT) die horrible deaths at sea. The landing still succeeds, but the grip is tenuous and without the HQ support the Allies have a hard time pushing inland. The Germans and Italians respond by moving troops up to contain the invasion. In subsequent naval battles as the Allies try to keep supply, the Axis NAV continue to do damage, sinking the CV Furious and damaging the Bearn and BB Oklahoma. Much of the CW CVP is destroyed in the process. The Allies do manage to sink the Duc D'Aosta in the Arabian sea in some side action.
  The Allies launch major strategic bombing raids, destroying a factory in Berlin (and taking 3 BPs) and destroying a factory in Leipzig as well. The Austrian oil is again hit, reducing German oil supplies. The Baltic remains without convoys and the Germans lose the Swedish iron ore.
  The Pacific is no less active. The Americans invade and retake Dutch Harbor, although there is not much resistance from the Japanese, who are occupied elsewhere. Japan declares war on Free France and invade Madagascar. At the same time, Japanese troops surprise the CW, invading Durban. At the end of the turn, both Madagascar and South Africa are conquered. Japanese naval forces with troops position in South Africa, threatening the Atlantic. To add insult to injury, late in the turn Japanese MARs invade Adelaide in southern Australia, sinking the Queens in the process (the shipped were disorganized in the port).
  It has been a tough summer so far for the Allies, with a major invasion failing in Italy (last turn) and a second major invasion succeeding but barely holding on in southern France. Despite some Soviet successes, the German continue to be on the offensive and chew up Soviet corps and territory, although progress is slow. The Japanese seem mostly unopposed and are expanding rapidly.

Sept/Oct 1943:  The Axis win the first initiative roll, but desperate Allies demand a reroll and win the reroll. The weather starts out shockingly clear. The western allies start by posting major naval forces off the coast of northern France in both the Bay of Biscay and the North Sea. Next impulse they launch two invasions, one at St. Naz. and the other next to Brest. The first invasion fails after major Axis air support tips the scales, but the northern invasion succeeds. On the Allied third impulse, reserve forces invade directly into Brest and succeed! The Allies have a major port and two contiguous hexes in Brittany. German armor and reaction forces are en route, however. The Italians also rebase land and air forces to France, but keep most of their NAV in the Med.
  In the USSR the Soviet counterattack continues and the pesky Soviets retake Kursk and threaten to pocket several German corps there. The Germans respond and counter by pocketing Kursk instead. In addition the Germans use the Rumanian forces to assault and take Odessa, taking the city for a second time. A major assault on Dnepropetrovsk also succeeds, completing the capture of the vital basin. When all seems to be going the German's way, on the 3rd Allied impulse the Soviets make a bold attack in north, bashing Rundstedt and putting most of the German army in the north out of supply. The Germans rally by railing HQs to the area and spend the rest of the turn withdrawing southward from Moscow to escape being pocketed. Bad late turn weather helps the Germans escape the noose, but the Soviets have pushed the German away from Moscow. A late turn attack sees the Soviets retake Rostov, killing a German ARM and INF in the city.
  Italy sinks the lonely BB Revenge which was trying to establish supply in the now increasingly quiet Med. Minor strategic bombing nets one BP from the Germans in Breslau.
  In the Pacific the Americans set up for some kind of major invasion in the Solomons on the first impulse. But on impulse 2 the Japanese decide to come play in force, bringing most of their navy. They achieve minor surprise, but win the early air combats. The result is carnage. The US loses 2 TRS with both of their best MARs on board, the CV Yorktown and the CA Chicago. The BBs New Mexico and Nevada are damaged and the US loses a total of 5 CVPs. The total Japanese loss was one NAV (lost to AA fire). Meanwhile the Japanese send out fleets mid-turn into the Southern Atlantic with troops, apparently looking for bases to leapfrog up the African coast. Japan also launches two attacks in China, taking a resource hex in the south and bashing a desert hex in the north. The Japanese exult at the success of the turn

Nov/Dec 1943: The weather starts bad ('10') and gets worse ('12'), making for a short turn. The Japanese rebase their subs to Dakar at the end of last turn and use the base to strike all the way in to the Caribbean, where they exact a toll from the Americans and British. Plenty of spare convoys are available, however, and there is no major loss to Allied production. The Japanese lose one sub in the combats but the Japanese pick off the CA Birmingham in the Pacific.
  The Soviet front is mostly quiet as the Germans continue to try and re-establish a line, slowly falling back towards a rough line that runs from Gomel to short of Rostov in the south. The Soviets keep Kursk as the German eventually rationalize their line to its west. Reinforcements from Germany mostly head north to reinforce the now weak German line east of Vitebsk.
  The Western Allies reinforce the precarious beachhead in Brittany and also reinforce Denmark. More strategic bombers arrive from the US and the Allies are having trouble finding enough bases near the front. The turn ends early with a whimper.

Jan/Feb 1944: The weather improves slightly to be merely bad, but the turn runs longer than expected with 6 total impulses (3 each side). In the Pacific the Japanese set up for something in the Marshalls, but the US Navy achieves a major surprise in a naval combat, sinking the CV Akagi and the CVL Ryujo along with many Japanese carrier planes. The attack is aborted, but not much else happens in the Pacific as the Japanese have control of most areas. The US and Japan continue to dance about supplying forces in the Pacific. Near the end of the turn the Japanese port strike Darwin, damaging two quality US subs there.
  The CW and US strategically bomb despite the weather, and take three total BPs and resouces (1 BP 2 res) from the Germans. The Axis war machine is nonetheless doing quite well, with the Germans building in the high 30s and Italy at 14 on average. The Germans try to destroy a pocket of Soviet tanks in the south, but intrepid Soviet bombers clear (at -7 on the air combat table) and cause the attack to fail with a single German casualty.
  The Allies in France continue to hold on and take another hex, but cannot push forward effectively. More troops head to Denmark and the Allies set up for offensive operations with troop movements in Britain.

Mar/Apr 1944: The Axis win initiative and elect to go first to forestall Allied plans. German reinforcements in France have now built a solid line, but the Allies surprise the Germans by launching a new invasion in the Netherlands. The attempt succeeds and nets the Allies two coastal hexes, threatening the German flank. The Germans respond with a careful retreat in western France and pile up units around the Dutch beachhead. The Allies gain a few more hexes in western France as a result, but have not achieved a breakthrough. Despite the build-up in Denmark no action occurs there, probably because all of the ground strikes keep failing.
  The Soviets and Germans do not do much in the rain, but the German eliminate the pesky Berdiansk pocket (2 Soviet ARM) with the loss of a MECH. The German line is now fairly well established, running from just south of Gomel along the Dnieper past Kiev to Dnepropetovsk and Stalino in the south. More Germans arrive around Vitebsk to strengthen the area. The front once again settles into solid lines.
  The Chinese are sneaky and manage to snake a MOT corps into Hainan, removing the resource point from the Japanese. China has remained fairly quiet as a front, however. The Chinese are nearly built out, so one expects some assaults at some point from the Chinese. The Japanese and Americans continue to dance a bit with fleets, but the Japanese insistently push forward, taking more islands around Hawaii. This turn they take two islands to the south at the junction of three sea zones as well as two of the westernmost Hawaiian Islands. Land based air moves forward. The Japanese also retake all but one of the islands in the Marshalls. An expeditionary force in southern Australia finally meets resistance, causing the Japanese to pull back to Adelaide.
  The British finally push forward into Burma and surround the partisans there, seeking to retake the Burma oil. The turn ends with the CW flipping units around four sides of the hex, setting up a likely attack next turn.

May/June 1944: A turn of turns! Heavy action returns to the game in both theatres. The Axis win the first initiative roll, but the Allies demand a reroll. The Axis win the second roll as well. The weather starts clear and beautiful world-wide, perfect for offensive operations.
  The Germans reinforce their western defenses in France, covering a short retreat as they appear to be looking to set up a strong defense line on the Seine running south to Lyon and then in to the southern French alps. More Italian planes and troops have entered France to take up defensive positions. In Russia the Germans try to bomb key forward hexes in the Russian lines with limited success. No attacks are made as the Germans are happy to hold the line.
  The Japanese take a naval and spread out across the ocean, putting Pearl out of supply and making units available for a new round of potential attacks. Could an invasion of Honolulu be coming?
  On the Allied impulse the US takes its first chit and take a super-combined. By sneaking out a Hellcat in the Coral Sea they manage to put the fleet in Hawaii back in supply. In a surprise move, the America fleet splits, half heading to the West Coast, but the fast ships all head off the coast of Japan. Same turn, the US invades Tokyo! US cvps fend off defense Japanese TAC but the attack is a limited success. One MAR corps and one MAR ENG land, but face down. A bunch of convoys relocate and one Japanese AMP is overrun and sunk (it was face down in the port). The US also manages to catch and sink the CA Myoko in a sea zone off of Hawaii.
  In Europe the Americans use the super combined to launch strategic bombing raids across western Europe. They are surprisingly successful despite losing two STRATs. The Germans lose 1 oil, 3 res, and 7 Bps all told, although no factories are destroyed. US ground strikes then hit and flip several units in France and the one unit defending Friedrichshaven in northern Denmark. The US attacks Nantes, allowing for a potential breakout in western France. The CW set up with a naval, and troops are on AMPHs in the North Sea.
  Next impulse the Axis are not going to sit idly by. The weather worsens slightly (Rain in the Arctic). The reserve Japanese navy in Truk sails north to try and catch the Americans - and they don't.  The Japanese also return Yamamoto to Japan and set up to bring back more troops to the homeland. Since the US troops are face down early in the turn, there is no rush.
  Germany tries to fall back in France to the safety of the Seine line, but the flipped units complicate the maneuver, especially since a HQ was also flipped the previous impulse - on the wrong side of the river. But there are plenty of troops for the maneuver and the retreat is orderly. German FTRs claim some victories and the front is solid. A joint German/Vichy assault kills the isolated units in southern France (from the invasion now nearly a year old). In Russia the Germans reposition the line to make it stronger but are not tempted to attack in the rain.
  On impulse 4, the Soviets continue to push forward. Lead elements reach Vitebsk as the northern front stretches westward. German TAC clear to make an assault on Vitebsk fail (1/-) and flip the Soviets, who have enough HQs to reflip most of the attackers. The CW eliminate the partisans in Burma, reclaiming the oil. They also invade and take Friedrichshaven, securing their rear in Denmark and potentially opening up the Baltic soon if the Allies can take Copenhagen (which is defended by a single 5-4 Inf adjacent to, but not in the city). Americans blitz and take a resource hex in France and kill several face-down German units, but achieve no breakthroughs. The German line holds, but the Allies are now advancing several hexes and opening up into France. Bordeaux is liberated in the south along with Toulouse, where there is no opposition. The beachhead in Holland remains at two hexes.
  The Japanese try again in impulse 5 to catch the Americans and this time they succeed. They get enough surprise to pick a surface, and sink the CAs Portland, Wichita, and Boston and manage to damage the CV Bunker Hill and CV Hornet. The Japanese lose the CA Furutaka and have the BB Kirishima damaged. The US fleet is forced to abort the zone, leaving the US troops in Tokyo isolated. The Japanese also take islands in the Tarawa chain, removing yet more Allied land based air bases. The Germans reposition in France again, trying to fall back in order to the Seine-Lyon line. Little changes on the Russian front.
  In impulse 6 the US takes a combined to advance in France and also try and save the Tokyo beachhead. They drop off an additional INF div in Tokyo and re-establish supply with two cruisers. The Japanese try to find them, but fail. The US chews up another hex in France, trying to wrap around the retreating Germans, who continue to frustrate Allied attempts at encircling the Germans. The Denmark units reposition southwards (a CW operation) and CW units in Burma after the successful attack also start to reposition south and east.
  Japan reinforces the homeland and moves ships to cut the American marines out of supply in Tokyo. The US fleet has been fully committed so there is little the US can do. At the turn's end, the Americans remained face down and out of supply. The Germans shift gears and mount a surprise blitz attack on the Allied beachhead in Belgium, killing a US HQ and closing the noose around the remaining American paratroopers. The next impulse the Germans complete the operations, destroying the beachhead entirely and freeing up badly needed troops to defend the new line just west of the Seine. That line does stabilize with the help of new Italian land units and aircraft. the Axis do not have air parity, but they are close with the new Italian planes. At the end of the turn the Italians rebase a lot of NAV from the Med to the coast of the North Sea. The Germans squeeze in a combined and land an additional corps in Copenhagen, but the Allies steadily advance, securing hexes on the island.
  At the end of the turn the Japanese are set up to attack Tokyo (but have not done so), the Italians are looking meaner than ever, and the Germans are holding the line in Russia and central France. Strategic bombing and oil use severely restricted the German economy, who built lower (21 BPs) than they have in years. The weight of Allied arms is beginning to show, but will it be soon enough with only just over a year left in the game?

July/August 1944: The turn will be a long one suitable for the summer. The Axis win initiative, but have to demand a reroll to get it. The Germans spend the turn reshuffling the southern front in Russia and rushing troops to the northern front in the face of a growing Soviet threat there. The Russians mid-turn drop a chit and assault the strongly held Vitebsk, taking it without loss. The German line is compromised and so starts a slow withdrawal for the Axis in the north only. By the end of the turn the Soviets manage to get next to Minsk (without taking it) and the line runs north through Pskov and along Lake Peipsi. In the West, the Germans mass some armor and launch a daring attack on the Allied beachhead in Belgium. The Axis are unlucky in the air battle, losing a FTR and having all the Allied support bombers clear despite flying at an advantage, but Germans are the master of the tank and blitz off the defenders (rolled an '18' on the +4 blitz) in the first hex. Next impulse, the German finish the job, killing a MAR and PARA and eliminating the threat in the rear.
  Meanwhile the Italians decide to enter the fray and rebase a large number of NAV to the North Sea coast. Next impulse they fly out en mass, trying to wrest control of the North Sea. After 4 attempts and 4 misses, the Italians finally find the Allies and inflict serious damage. The BB Nevada, KGV, and Prince of Wales all sink, along with the cruisers Vincennes. The BB Colorado and the CA Quincy are damaged to no Axis losses. Nonetheless, the Allies hang on and keep a naval presence, keeping the troops in Denmark in supply. The Italians do something similar in the Med, sending NAV out after a CW fleet in the Western Med. After a few impulses of no combat, the Italians find the fleet, sinking the CV Courageous and damaging the CV Indomitable and CA Hawkins. The Italians lose only the CA Zara. The battles give the Italians control of the entire Med.
  In the Pacific the Japanese send the entire fleet to park off of the coast of Japan, protecting their counterattack to reclaim the capital. The attack succeeds without loss and all Americans are expelled from the homeland. The move allows the US to pick off some Japanese ships elsewhere (the CA Ashigara and Oyodo are sunk) and reposition. The US also manages to invade Kwajalein and take it near the end of the turn.
  The strategic bombing campaign continues against Germany, who suffers an oil hex destroyed (in Germany) and four other BP losses. The Italians lose the CA Trieste in the Arabian sea to the small remaining CW flotilla operating in India. The Allied line in France now stretches from coast to coast as the US pushes into Marseilles in the south. The Axis hold a line one hex west of the Seine down to Nice in the Alps.

Sept/Oct 1944: The turn starts clear, but the weather turns bad quickly (and stays that way). The Soviets start out by assaulting Minsk with PARA. They take the city with minor losses. The Allies follow by assaulting and taking Copenhagen after cutting the island out of supply. The Soviets do the heavy lifting, sinking the BB Gneisenau and damaging the BB Scharnhorst to the loss of one damaged sub. The way through the Baltic will be open next turn at long last!
  The Americans do not make much headway in France, making two attacks but failing in both. They do, however, strategically bomb even in the poor weather, taking 4 BPs again with minor air losses on both sides.
  The Italians return to their dominating ways, taking control of the Med again after an Allied fleet sails into both the Eastern and Western Med. Italian NAV with some support from the Germans sinks the CA Effingham and Frobisher while damaging the BB Texas, Queen Elizabeth, and the CAs Manchester and Suffolk. All of the Allies are again driven out of the Med.
  In the Pacific the Americans sail out a giant fleet and successfully invade Wake, killing the Japanese defenders without loss. The Japanese respond by sneaking into the Aleutians and seizing Dutch Harbor again after the Americans emptied the land units to invade forward. US sub activity tried to sink Japanese shipping, to no avail as the poor weather hinders sighting. The turn ends on an Axis gamble, with Italy and Japan passing while Germany re-orders its line in the Soviet Union. The gamble pays off as the -1 modifier turns out to be the difference, ending the turn.

Nov/Dec 1944: The weather stays bad, hampering Allied efforts. The Japanese reinforce SE Asia and retake Rangoon on a +17 assault, killing two CW units without loss. There is now a hefty line of Indian troops facing a hefty line of Japanese reinforcements. The Allies slowly creep up against the Japanese incursion in Australia, and the Japanese fall back, unwilling to commit more to the endeavor. The US take back the island next to Midway, but the poor weather means not much else is done.
  Likewise, Europe is quiet. The Germans slowly start withdrawing from the Soviet Union, unable to completely cover the front now that the Pripets have frozen. The Soviets tentatively push forward, threatening to cut off the Germans, but again and again the Germans rebuild the lines. At turn's end the Germans still hold the Dnieper line and Kiev, but their troops have fallen back generally. The Soviets penetrate into Latvia and Estonia, which the Germans abandon part way through the turn. No strategic bombing sees the German economy take off again. The turn ends with a whimper, frustratingly so for the Allies, who need to go on the offensive in Western Europe.

Jan/Feb 1945: The weather will not clear, resulting in a short turn. The Chinese assault just east of Hanoi and their boldness is rewarded with a successful +5 assault (natural 20 rolled!). The front does not otherwise change. China has been inactive for 3 years now.
  The US and Japanese do tangle again the Marshalls. The naval battle is a minor American victory, as the CV Zuikaku is sunk with the CA Chokai damaged. The US loses the CV Bennington while the CW loses the CA Sheffield. Not much otherwise changes, except for the US picking off another Pacific island. The threatened Japanese encirclement of Hawaii is eased a bit. The Japanese surprise the CW with a long distance sub raid in the Caribbean. The CW have plenty of spares, but the move diverts naval assets into the Western hemisphere.
  In Europe the Soviets grind forward slowly, making some small attacks. Latvia and Estonia are liberated. The Soviets push into Lithuania. The Germans leave a strong garrison in Kiev but pull back to a line anchored by Odessa. The Soviets concentrate in the north, attacking and killing a few stacks but with constant casualties.
  The US and CW launch a snowy strategic bombing run, taking 5 BPs from Germany but nothing else. Again there is no movement on the land in Western Europe except in southern France, where the US pushes up against an Italian held line in the French Alps.
  The turn ends after only 4 impulses.

Mar/April 1945: The CW relocated troops to deal with the Japanese menace in the Southern Atlantic, taking Dakar (capturing a Japanese sub there) and capturing St. Helena. The Japanese sub threat is eliminated. In Australia the CW finally assault the swamp in southern Australia, taking the hex and reducing the Japanese presence there to a single TER of South African pro-Japanese volunteers. They will remain there through the end of the game.
  The big news is a major naval battle again in the Marshalls. Most of the Japanese and US fleets are there. (The FTR combat was 20 vs 18 with huge numbers of NAV and CVPs.) The US first gets minor surprise, but the Japanese have the slight FTR advantage and make use of it, ultimately clearing 32 NAV points against the US fleet. In the first round the US loses the CV Intrepid sunk and the CV Yorktown II, BB Idaho and BB Arizona damaged. The Japanese suffer no losses. Hoping to escape notice and a port strike, the US decides to remain in the sea zone. The Japanese, however, find some luck and surprise the US fleet. The Japanese take some aircraft loses, but no ship damage. The US loses the CVs Bunker Hill and Ranger, and the CA Salt Lake City. Most of the US land based air cover is gone. Unable to risk the combat, the US abandon the sea zone for Pearl. The turn improbably continues (60% chance) and the Japanese strike the port, sinking an AMPH and TRS, sinking the BB California, and damaging the BB Pennslyvania and CV Hornet. The CW also lose a TRS (loaded with an Australian INF) in a separate combat near Perth. The US Combat capability is severely damaged.
  In Europe the Soviets are on the move, closing the gap in the south (and taking Kiev). They push up against Odessa and reclaim all of the USSR except that city. In the north they assault and take Kaunas and push into East Prussia by assaulting Memel. The Soviet line is large and menacing, but the Germans have held them at bay. In the West the Allies again cannot manage to advance, making no land attacks and no strategic bombing. The Germans and Italians contest the North Sea, but to no effect. The US and CW rearrange their lines in France and prepare for the clear weather.

May/June 1945: The weather clears and the Western Allies lurch forward. After successful ground strikes in central France, the US takes key hexes west of the Seine, pushing the German line back. A logistical error in the south precludes an attack there as the air transports were not set up properly for a PARA attack. Nonetheless, the Allies are on the offensive. A massive strategic bombing raid is made on Berlin - including a plane loaded with the first atomic bomb - but the German FTRs fend off the raid, even shooting down the strat with the A-bomb. The Soviets push forward again.
  The game ends (time allowed expired) after the first impulse of the May/June 1945 turn.

Game Results (modified bid, then objectives minus bid = total score)

1st: Japan (bid -1) 15 - -1 = 16              Alex "the General" Abbott

2nd: Italy (bid -4) 10 - -4 = 14               Auberon "fratastic" Crocker

3rd Germany (bid 10) 15 - 10 = 5          James "Lames" Crandall
                                                                and Tyler Hines

4th USSR (bid 16) 6 - 16 = -10             David "France who?" Hart

5th USA/China (bid 21) 11 - 21 = -10    Logan "happy" McDonald

6th CW (bid 22) 10 -22 = -12                Ryan "I know what I'm doing" Gale
                                                                and Maryska Connolly-Brown

Congratulations to all - this was a fun and often tense game with plenty of interesting play!

WAR! 1 Sept 1939. Dateline London (Reuters): The lights are going out again in Europe. After years of conflict with the Sino-Japanese war, Europe has heard the clarion call of death and destruction. Germany invaded Poland in the wee hours of 1 September 1939, allegedly in response to provocation by Polish incursions on to German soil. France and Britain quickly responded, declaring war on Germany in support of their Polish allies. No plans to send troops to Poland have been announced, however. Not wishing to be left out of the dance, Italy declared war on France and Britain on 8 September, pledging to support their German allies. This reporter does not know where this conflict will lead the world, except of course to a world in flames.

New British Intelligence Service Works to Iron Out Kinks in System. 9 September 1939. Dateline Valetta, Malta (AP Newswire): MI13, the new British intelligence service created under the auspices of the new Prime Minister Ryan "Blows a" Galehill, admitted serious defects in their information gathering services. Apparently MI13 alerted the Royal Navy to an imminent Italian attack on the port of Alexandria in Egypt. Instead, the Italians invaded Malta, which had been stripped of defenses at the last minute to reinforce Egypt. "We all get one wrong now and again," said P.O. Boyo, head of MI13. "But at least we finished the design on our new smart MI13 uniforms. We did look exceptionally sharp in the War Cabinet meeting." MI13 has separately announced plans to release their own line of dinner and evening formal ware for the discerning members of high society.

World Continues to Not Care about Chinese War. 18 September 1939. Dateline Chungking (World News Daily): Despite two and half years of continuous war in China and millions dead, wounded, or displaced, the rest of the world continues to turn a blind eye to Japanese aggression in the Pacific. Last week the Japanese once again advanced in central China, seizing a major industrial center outside of the city of Were-Dat. World attention instead is keenly fixed on Europe, where German and Italian forces are mobilizing for a larger continental conflagration. Japanese Prime Minister Abjo was not available for comment, but his office released an official statement noting "What war? There is a local dispute that friendly neighbors can resolve themselves."

Japanese Soldiers Go Missing; Emperor’s Cabinet Denies Rumors of Failed Attacks. Shanghai, 15 February 1940, Pale Horse Herald. Two divisions of Japanese infantry, encompassing both a garrison unit and an infantry division, have mysteriously vanished from their postings outside of Canton and Hangchow, respectively. Locals in the surrounding areas reported sounds of heavy fighting and sightings of the Imperial Marine Corps, but these rumors are unconfirmed. Japanese brass has consistently denied claims that any failed assaults have taken place. Instead, claims European turncoat commander Alex “Bonsai—The Tree, Not the Charge” Abbott, “The men of two units of the Imperial Japanese Army have not, as has been suggested, been killed in ill-fated assaults. Indeed, there is no way that this turn of events could have happened, despite what the Emperor’s enemies allege. The men of these divisions are simply vacationing at a farm upstate. You’ll see them soon enough. They still love you and they’ll be just as excited to see you as you are to see them!” Abbott then stepped away from the podium and could be heard whispering to an aide about his childhood pets before the microphone was silenced.

Japanese Implement Effective Strategy to End Chinese Infighting. Dateline: Wuhan, 21 July 1940 (Reuters). Yesterday, the Imperial Japanese Army brokered a monumental peace agreement between Chiang Kai-Shek, leader of the Nationalist Chinese forces, and Mao Zedong, leader of the Communist forces in the area. Isoroku Yamamoto, a Japanese naval commander, was curiously at the head of negotiations. This agreement likely means peace among the Chinese people for the first time since the beginning of the Chinese Civil War, which has been in progress for nearly 13 years. Reports of a large battle happening simultaneously as the peace agreement was signed are unconfirmed, but civilian leaders and military personnel have ceded that Japanese forces have moved into a buffer zone west of Wuhan, designed to keep the Communist and Nationalist forces apart. Any violation of this so-called “De-Militarized Zone” by either Mao’s or Chiang’s forces will likely meet with a stern reprimand from the Japanese, who have graciously taken charge as the chief arbiters in Asia and the Pacific

Germans Unleash New Secret Weapon in Battle for Paris. Dateline: Paris, 6 August 1940 (UPI). French troops defending the beleaguered city of Paris woke on the morning of 18 July to the horrific sound of a new German weapon. Apparently the Germans have attached loud speakers to their dive bombers which produce a loud whining noise when they dive to attack. Many French positions have now been 'whine-bombed' and German whining has never been at a higher level during the conflict. "We just could not take it anymore," said Gen. Le Poup, commander of the French forces in Paris. "The Germans kept advancing, kept winning, and then with the whining, we had had enough." The French commander surrendered the city to the Germans on the morning of 5 August 1940 to spare the city more whining.

Germans Start Reef Building Program in Atlantic. Dateline: Kiel, Kriegsmarine HQ, 20 Sept 1940 (Der Welt). The German naval command announced a new program Monday to "improve the ecosphere of the entire world through Fascist innovation." The plan calls for building reefs in various bodies of water to encourage wildlife and promote natural fisheries. "We have started the first one in the Faroes Gap near the coast of Northern Ireland as a show of solidarity with the people of Britain and Ireland," said Admiral "too hip to be a" Raeder. Apparently the Germans are sinking older warships to start the reef building exercise. When it was pointed out that the ships in question were in fact sunk by the British and that the locations of the wrecks were not actually conducive to reef formation, Raeder replied, "Meh, it is a verk in progress."

Chinese Welcome Japanese Peacekeepers into Kunming. Dateline: Hanoi, 25 November 1940, AP. The last two weeks have been remarkably eventful in Southeast Asia and southern China. Japanese forces first took administrative control of Indo-China, which had previously been under control of Vichy France, before also making a foray into south-central China. With no Chinese units between multiple units of the Japanese Imperial Army and the city of Kunming, Japanese forces liberated the city from the oppressive grasp of Chiang Kai-Shek’s overbearing regime on November 23^rd. Chinese citizens welcomed the Japanese troops. Colonel Neil “decades ahead of his time” Young of the IJA said that citizens of Kunming were ecstatic to have the “kinder, gentle machine gun hand” of the Japanese in control of the city. Many metric tons’ worth of production supplies were found stockpiled in warehouses in the cities, and together with the clothing-producing supplies and factories in Hanoi and Kunming, respectively, the Japanese will have a significant uptick in their production for the near-future. Asked about the reports of significant raping and pillaging occurring in the captured city, Young offered a cryptic response. “It’s better to burn out,” Young intoned, “than to fade away.” This reporter wonders whether the hundreds of young Chinese women who were killed in an orgy of volatile nature would agree. Nonetheless, the Greater East Asian Co-Prosperity Sphere continues to grow, as Japan attempts to bring peace to the region for the first time in many decades.

Italians March and Take Alexandria. Butchered English Scatter Towards Cairo. Dateline: Port Said, 31 July 1941 (Linguini News). The Italian army in Egypt invaded and conquered the great city of Alexandria with the aid of air superiority and brilliant morale early this evening. The loss of the city continues a trend of Italian victories in British East Africa. The worry now is that the Italians will push farther and attempt to capture Port Said, Cairo, and the Suez Canal, all massively important for the British war cause. Said one British naval captain, “The risk of losing Egypt is definitely worrisome. Not only will we lose access to the Suez but we will also lose Port Said - our most valuable port.” Another captain added “Yes, we all hold Port Said very dear. About 95% of the Royal Navy started there and around 99% are stationed there every month.” The people of London have already demanded a response to the fall of Alexandria from the government. British prime minister Winsome (and lose most) Churchgale responded, “The loss of Alexandria is just a strategical retreat. The people of Britain can rest assured that we are doing all we can to fix the situation.” Churchgale then quickly left the press conference muttering something about checking the British convoys. Churchgale has already taken several strategical retreats throughout the course of the war (Malta, France, Alexandria, etc.) and the people of Britain hope that there is actually some purpose behind these “retreats”.

British Forces in Mediterranean Shift Naval Bases. Dateline: Cairo, 14 August 1941, BBC. For months, British forces in the Mediterranean theatre have been operating out of Port Said in Egypt, but Whitehall recently announced via an official memo that the new home port of the Med Fleet is Port Said. Instead of remaining in Gibraltar (not to mention Alexandria and Malta, which have been captured by the Italian forces currently engaging British troops), the Royal Navy has shifted its main base of operations to Port Said. While the Eastern Med base offers better access to the Suez Canal, the Red Sea, and the Indian Ocean, few British vessels have gone eastward. In addition, this rebasing of the fleet takes cruisers and air cover away from British shipping from the Bay of Biscay to West Africa, which has been hit hard by Italian and German submarine raids. When asked about the move, commander of the Port Said Fleet Andrew Countryham offered few answers. “We’ve always used Port Said,” Countryham said. “That ship started in Port Said, this ship started in Port Said, all those ships in Denmark started in Port Said, and even that very slow transport, a relic of the First World War, that’s in Adelaide—it started in Port Said, too.” This reporter wonders what the Royal Navy will do once Port Said falls, a seemingly inevitable outcome given the speed with which Italian troops and German air assets are advancing.

Japanese Vow to Pursue Peaceful Measures in East Asia. Dateline: Taihokuo, 16 August 1941, Reuters. Japanese officials said today that they are committed to finding peaceful solutions to the current troubles in East Asia. “We recognize that the peoples of Malaya, the Dutch East Indies, Australia, India, Siberia, Mongolia, the Hawaiian Islands, Samoa, New Caledonia, New Britain, Rubaul, Burma, Alaska, California, Vancouver, South Africa, Madagascar, Egypt, and Hong Kong are all suffering under the yoke of oppression. We vow to set these peoples free, but we are committed to doing so in humane and peaceful ways,” said Hideki Abbottojo, Prime Minister of Japan, through an interpreter on Tuesday. Abbottojo continued, “We are currently pursuing a number of strategies to release these people from their second-rate status as colonial subjects. We are already discussing lease agreements with the USSR to alleviate the burden on their Siberian citizens. Additionally, we have explored lease agreements with the Dutch in Palembang, the Americans in Hawaii, and the British in Calcutta. However, these Westerners seem less willing to cooperate. We will soon begin negotiating tracts of land in China—Shanghai, Kunming, and the like—to barter for places like Singapore and Rabaul. If all else fails, we are prepared to intervene directly in these imperial relics and set the people free. We will storm ashore with our bayonets fixed, massacring the Europeans who stand in our way and sparing no lives, all in the interest of keeping peace and freeing colonial subjects.”

War with Germany and Italy! Dateline Washington D.C. [date] It’s finally come! After years of trampling on the free nations of Europe, we’ve finally coming to put those fascist thugs back where they belong.  While there was some opposition in congress initially, it was ended by a stirring speech from our president, and the bill to declare war was passed almost unanimously.  As we go to print, American troops under the command of Maj. Gen. Eisenhower are already landing in Britain, preparing for landings somewhere in the European theater.  Our powerful strategic bomber fleet is also in Transit to British and Danish air bases in preparation for a new, devastating bombing campaign.  I hope you’re ready Hitler and Mussolini!

U.S. Forces Face Little Resistance in Marshalls Campaign. Dateline: Honolulu. 2 May 1942, AP Newswire. Admiral Nimitz was reported as saying last week that “Our boys are facing weak to no resistance from Japanese forces in the southern Marshall Islands, we’re just walking off the boats.”  Reports from the field also indicate that no shots were even fired during the landings by the 1^st Marine Division and Naval Construction Battalion on Majuro and Rongelap last month.  One Marine was quoted as saying that “There were just a few administrative guys in some shacks beside the airstrip.  I don’t even think they had guns.  At least the Japs at Midway put up a fight.”  Needless to say this is good news to our troops in the pacific, as we prepare to start shipping more units to Britain to stop the cruel fascist overlords dominating Western Europe.  New, enlarged air bases are expected to be in operation on those atolls within a month.  In the meantime, newly repaired ships damaged in the comically anemic initial Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor are arriving in that same harbor every week.  For a nation so eager to go to war with us, they don’t seem to be very willing to actually fight us.

Japanese Declare War on Soviets. Dateline: Tokyo. 8 May 1942, Stars and Stripes. With no provocation or warning, as usual, Japanese forces in Korea and Manchuria have surrounded and captured the Russian port of Vladivostok, as well as several key mines on the Manchurian border, all just days after sending a formal declaration of war to Moscow.  When asked for comment, President Roosevelt simply shook his head and told the press he had been warning the Soviet government of Japan’s buildup on their border and there penchant towards treachery, but they hadn’t listened.  He was pleased, however, by the account of Japanese forces landing in Persia.  He said the Soviets have easily defended their oil fields there and that all the Japanese will gain is a useless sliver of mountains and desert that their already overstretched forces will have to protect.

Russian Forces Repel Weak Japanese Attack. Vladivostok, 8 May 1942, Pravda. Russian forces today easily repulsed a Japanese assault, taking no casualties and inflicting severe damage on Japanese morale. The Vladivostok militia, stationed in the port city since the outbreak of war with Nazi Germany last year, has been on high alert for the past three months as Japanese troops swarm into Manchukuo and Korea. Tensions have been mounting on the border and many believed that war was inevitable and rapidly approaching.The proverbial powder keg was set off Friday when a cat crossed the so-called De-Militarized Zone from Japanese lines to Soviet trenches southwest of the city. Fearing a bomb attack, Russian soldiers and officers immediately responded bravely, taking less than 8 minutes and fewer than 2,000 rounds of ammunition to kill the interloper. After resisting the all-out assault, the Russian commander in charge of the city, Marshal Boris “I would have been defending the city if I hadn’t already been killed on the Western Front” Shaposhnikov ordered over 10,000 liters of vodka shipped to the city and declared three days of revelry for Russian soldiers and civilians. This overwhelming battle will no doubt turn the tide of Japanese expansion in East Asia and will be remembered as a major strategic and tactical victory for Mother Russia for years to come.

Japanese Forces Surprise, Rout Soviet Troops in Combined-Arms Assault. Vladivostok, 10 May 1942, Pyongyang Times. In the wake of the cat-killing atrocity committed (poorly) by Soviet soldiers last Friday, the Japanese Imperial Army and Navy combined to wrest the city of Vladivostok from thousands of cold, dead, Russian hands. After the Red Army killed Japanese soldiers’ mascot, affectionately known as sashimi, the Emperor and his cabinet vowed revenge on the murderous brutes responsible. During a three-day leave for the defenders of Vladivostok, the Japanese Army—with heavy support from the Japanese Navy—declared war on the Soviet Union and quickly routed the drunken defenders of the city, who ultimately caused more friendly fire casualties than any damage they inflicted on the attacking troops. Recognizing that the vodka-induced low-alert status of the Russian soldiers was due to end the following day, Japanese commanders declared war and immediately invaded their northern neighbor on the morning of Sunday, May 10^th. Simultaneously, invasions occurred elsewhere in Soviet territory, including two near the city of Khabarovsk and another in Soviet-occupied Persia. The designs of the Japanese high command are not yet clear, but the leaders have certainly achieved revenge and exacted humiliation on their foes in the USSR. It is not yet known whether the Empire of Japan will use the major port of Vladivostok to launch future invasions of the Soviet Union or if the Greater East Asian Co-Prosperity Sphere has ceased its northward expansion for the time being. Regardless, the Imperial Japanese Army has now shown that it has more than enough manpower to embarrass any foe that would dare stand in its way.

British Celebrate 'Tunisia Day' Commemorating First Victory of War. London, 26 July 1942, Reuters. In what some politicians have called "the most joyous day since Trafalgar" Britons across the Commonwealth turned out to celebrate the successful liberation of Tunisia from the Italians. Hardened British veterans who fled from the fight in France two years ago returned to action at long last, seizing the undefended port of Sousse before marching northward and taking Tunis in a 20 minute battle that mostly involved territorial units surrendering in formation. "I won't say this means that British troops now have the critical combat experience they need," says Col. Reginald "don't spit into the" Gale, "but it is the most combat experience any currently living British unit has had, with the exception of the Indian corps currently starving to death in central Egypt." Discussions are currently underway as to what other non-defended target the British can take next.

American Landing Crafts Sunk with All Hands on Deck, Marines Presumed Dead. Honolulu, 28 July 1942, New York Times. In what some military experts are calling the “worst maritime disaster in U.S. history,” nearly 20,000 American troops met their ends last week. While the majority of the U.S. Navy’s Pacific Fleet was off chasing rabbits (and a few Japanese ships) off the coast of Dutch Harbor, Alaska, close to 100 transport ships, equipped with amphibious landing capabilities, sailed toward the Marshall Islands from Pearl Harbor. Their original destination is unclear, but Japanese naval elements found the lightly-protected transports and engaged the defenseless ships. A small contingent of American aircraft cover did little to keep the attackers at bay. After less than two hours of fierce but one-sided combat, 84 of the 92 American ships had been sunk, with over 98% of American servicemen involved drowning or being killed in the firefight. “It was the worst carnage I ever saw,” quipped Lieutenant Junior Grade John Kennedy, one of the 249 survivors, after an unsuccessful attempt to save the rest of his crewmen. President Logan “I swear I didn’t do this to harden the American people’s resolve against the Japanese” McDonaldsevelt asked the country for a day of remembrance for the bloodiest day in American history since the Battle of Antietam. An official inquiry into what the 1^st Marines were doing in the Central Pacific and why there was no better protection afforded them will commence shortly.

Wehrmacht Chooses New Uniforms. Berlin, 30 July 1942, AP Newswire. After some minor difficulties in combat situations on the Eastern Front, German officials have elected to replace the old 'red spot' grey uniforms with new uniformly grey ones. The old uniforms were distinctive for the bright red center circle on the front surrounded by concentric white and red circles, designed to "strike fear into the enemy with its bold colors and hide the blood, giving the enemy the impression that our soldiers are invincible" (translated from a pamphlet from the manufacturer, Das Blutboot Bros.).  Recent assaults on prepared Soviet positions have produced unusually high casualties, prompting some officials to launch an inquiry. The new uniform is also novel as it comes with sleeves.

Expedition to Find Zheng He’s Treasure Ends in Disaster. Pago Pago, September 8, 1942. Micronesia Courant. A U.S. Navy-led group of adventurers recently arrived in the Southwestern Pacific Ocean to search for the rumored treasure of Ming Dynasty admiral Zheng He. Instead of aiding in the quest to find spices, gold, or even the wreckage of Ming ships, the voyage ended in disaster when multiple U.S. Navy ships, including a pair of aircraft carriers, were sunk. Most of these rumors of Zheng He’s treasure claim that the windfall is somewhere in the Indian Ocean, but an American company recently announced a breakthrough and claimed that the treasure is actually sunk near the Gilbert Islands. The company, I.B. Gull & M.R. Able, enlisted the help of the U.S. Navy to try to find the lost treasure. Gull-Able was able to recruit the cream of the navy for the operation, with half a dozen aircraft carriers and nearly all of the USN’s Pacific Fleet battleships taking part. The carriers were specially chosen in order to provide stable, flat platforms that divers could use as bases for their dives.
   Unfortunately, a pair of diving mishaps doomed the expedition. First, the entire diving crew of the USS Enterprise went overboard at the same time, which created such an imbalance on board that the ship was doomed to capsize. All souls were lost in this sinking. The second disaster was caused by a false alarm raised over the USS Saratoga. While the diving crew was overboard, a crewman in the crow’s nest raised an alarm after sighting what he though was a Japanese dive bomber. The alarm rang out and all ships in the fleet turned to face the threat, apart from the Saratoga, which was still in the process of cutting its divers’ ropes and air hoses so that they would no longer encumber the ship. Meanwhile, the USS Chester and the USS Hornet both rammed into the large carrier, sinking both the Chester and the Saratoga while severely damaging the Hornet. The Japanese plane was later confirmed to be a rather large seagull.The U.S. Navy has denied reports that Japanese forces in the area were responsible for the sinking of these ships, and has claimed that Gull-Able is responsible for the disaster. No statement has yet been released on the frequency or legitimacy of these treasure hunts, or whether or not they will continue in the wake of this disaster.

Philippines Falls to Japanese War Machine; India, Australia, Hawaii under Threat. Batavia, December 25, 1942. Canton Courier. Japanese forces assaulted the city of Manila for the third time in this global conflict on Wednesday. Despite stormy conditions, the assault succeeded and the port city has now become a major center of operations for the Imperial Japanese Army and Navy. After two failed attempts to take the city earlier this year, the Japanese armed forces were finally able to capture the strategically located city on December 23^rd. After the first attempt failed after poor preparation and a general lack of resources devoted to the operation, a second attack seemed guaranteed to succeed in August. Instead, thanks to an unknown cause and American troops fighting with far better success than they had any reason to, that assault also failed. But last week Japanese troops finally stormed the city, with Lieutenant General Tomoyuki Yamashita and his staff occupying the nearby town of Olongapo. American General Douglas MacArthur, who “strategically retreated” to Los Angeles after watching his entire army die or fall prisoner, was heard whimpering, “I came through and I shall return when I’ve been built again.” Of more pressing importance is the newly granted free hand of the Japanese to press their initiative and institute their policies elsewhere. With bases currently stretching from the Seychelles and Ceylon in the Indian Ocean to Rabaul, the Marshall Islands, and the Aleutian Islands in the Pacific, the Japanese Imperial Army and Navy have now established themselves as the dominant power in East Asia. They have gone toe-to-toe with the USSR on land and come out victorious, and they have also taken land and naval bases from the Commonwealth of Nations, against token resistance. They have now defeated the United States on land, adding to the major naval victory they scored just two months ago. The Japanese war machine is firing on all cylinders, and nowhere is safe; once the Japanese put their sights on a location, be it India, Australia, Hawaii, or even the mainland United States, there is no stopping them.

Italian War Minister Says "Oops," Reveals He Traded Munitions for Favors. Rome, 27 December 1942, Il Fortuna. The Italian Minister of War, Aubbicone Croceroni, admitted today under intense questioning from internal auditors that he has been redirecting vital war material from munitions factories in order to pay for private favors and to cover gambling debts. The materials were all destined for Italy's single artillery munitions plant. As a result, for the past eight months no Italian artillery units have received functional shells. The investigation is on-going. Minister Croceroni has been allowed to remain at his post and pledges to double down on his latest endeavors.

Indian Quik-E-Mart Stock Soars. Mumbai/Bombay, 31 December 1942, Bombastic Times. Who needs a Quik-E-Mart? We do! The stock for the Indian based company that builds and manages convenience food stores in India, eastern Africa, and around the Pacific has nearly tripled in the past four months, largely based on the demand from only three stores located in Cairo and one in the desert to its west. Apparently Italian troops in Egypt have sat for so long without activity that the soldiers have now started engaging in a new activity called "hanging out" where they consume mass quantities of processed foods imported from India while standing outside the Mart and singing in absurd parodies of Indian English. Just 45km to the west, two full Indian corps remain cut off and encircled by the Italian army. Yet the Quik-E-Mart inside the Commonwealth lines is also doing record business. Apparently the Italians are so addicted to the wares that they are informally allowing the Quik-E-Mart inside the Commonwealth lines to be resupplied as a gesture of goodwill. The demand there is also so high that "trucks are seen driving in and out of the Quik-E-Mart almost nonstop 24 hours per day."

Americans Join British Allies in Reluctance to Fight. Honolulu, 20 February 1943, Honolulu Dispatch. Three dozen American construction engineers abandoned Johnston Atoll last week, as Japanese forces stormed ashore to token resistance. The capture of the islands gives the Imperial Japanese Navy and Army a new forward base from which to launch attacks on American troops and shipping in the Hawaiian Islands region. This combat follows the major theme that the Allies have been following in the Indian and Pacific Oceans of late: American, Russian, and British troops have been "strategically retreating" ever since the U.S. Navy lost a major engagement in the Southwestern Pacific Ocean. Admiral Chester Nimitz, commander of the U.S. fleet in Pearl Harbor, has been content to shuttle troops around and wait for Yamamoto to slip up. At press time, however, Yamamoto still has not blundered, and the U.S. Navy continues to sit on its haunches. Both the U.S. and the Commonwealth have made their goals clear: Port Said must be retaken, and British vessels must rebase there at great frequency again. However, such a strategy comes at great cost: the Allies have abandoned their territories and countrymen in the Pacific region. With the coming of spring comes campaigning weather. Will we see a determined U.S. in the Pacific, or will Roosevelt continue to play the waiting game with Tojo?

Allies Take Heavy Losses in Med Fighting. Rome. 2 June 1943. AP Newswire. A general Allied offensive against Italy was foiled by the brave actions of the Italian armed forces. Fearless housewives and old men near Venice used shovels and brooms to valiantly clean up the bodies of dead American paratroopers when they accidentally fell out of several thousand C-47s over the skies of Italy. "It was horrible!" said Gina Correta, "All those screams. I thought those boys were supposed to have parachutes when they jumped out of planes. I volunteered to clean up because those Yanks all have a lot of chocolate bars on them." The staunch Italian navy was not to be outdone. After fearlessly fleeing the British heavy ships for months, several bold squadrons of aircraft mercilessly bombed two battleships that had run aground on a cleverly constructed trap formed when the Italian navy sunk several of its own cruisers. "The trap was perfecto!" exclaimed Rolly Polly Auberponi, head of the naval air station on Malta. "Even our bombers could hit the British ships when stationary. Losing a few cruisers to bloody the Brits was completely worth it." The Italian Ministry of War refused to comment when asked how Italy planned to take advantage of their most recent successes.

British General Plays - and Loses - a Game of "Where's Burma?" Dateline London. 17 June 1943. Reuters. Commonwealth troops in India are currently under the able command of Lord Mountbatten, who has made the bold decision to place his headquarters in Karachi, some 1800km from the front lines in Burma. Pro-Japanese partisans occupied the Mandalay oil fields about 14 months ago, prompting a quick and vigorous response from the War Office. They immediately made arrangements to move the afternoon tea in Calcutta to 3pm instead of 2pm to allow the officers to have a shower and dry off after the late morning croquet matches. When pressed by PM Galehill about an apparent lack of action to reclaim the oil fields in Burma, Lord Mountbatten responded with surprise at the suggestion that Burma was once in fact a Commonwealth possession. According to inside sources it took Lord Mountbatten fourteen tries to successfully locate Burma on the world map. When asked for a reply to this report, Mountbatten's headquarters refused to comment on anything other than the upcoming "Ashes" cricket tournament, expressing great confidence in the English team this year. Note to the reader: The tournament (to be held in Australia) might be canceled this year pending threatening operations by the Empire of Japan.

Hoodoo Gurus Hit Tops Charts in Australia Amidst Japanese Occupation. 21 August 1943. Billboard Press Release. LONDON-- The Hoodoo Gurus have released a new song that has taken the Australian nation by storm almost as quickly as the invading Japanese troops. The song, entitled "Tojo Never Made It to Darwin," has Aussies rocking their boots off to a funky, driving beat. The song seems to deal with the singer's breakup with a girl named Tracy, but the mood quickly shifts. The song's chorus simply rolls off one's tongue: "Tojo never made it to Darwin; instead, he simply landed at Adelaide. Tojo saw too much resistance up north; he decided to hit down south." The Gurus have claimed their first hit since 1942's "Australia Will Never Fall (The ANZACs Will Protect Us All)" with this hit. The music scene has forever been impacted by the new tune's political nature, and we will have to see what the coming year holds for Australians.

Chavvy the Lion Among Casualties Amidst SADG Mishaps. Cape Town, 29 August 1943. BBC South Africa. The tide of Japanese aggression continues to rise, with South Africa becoming just the most recent victim in a series of daring conquests by the Imperial Japanese Army. But the greatest loss incurred in South Africa appears to be not the manpower, nor the coal resources mined there, but the South African Defense Group's mascot, Chavvy. After Japanese troops landed northeast of Durban last week, the SADG attempted to gather forces in Pretoria to protect the capital against Japanese General Yamashita and his crack troops. Unfortunately, they railed through Pretoria and all the way to N'Dola in Northern Rhodesia before realizing their mistake. By the time they recognized the error and tried to return, the capital city had been taken and the Japanese were preparing to expand the war into the Atlantic Ocean. In the carnage brought about in Pretoria, someone opened up the cage of Chavvy, the SADG's lion mascot. The lion attempted to escape the burning city, as Japanese troops tried to recapture the large cat. Chavvy managed to escape the Nippon invaders, but an American dentist on safari shot the gentle giant less than five miles from the city. Amid the current shift in government and the confusion caused by the invading troops, it is unclear whether or not the American will face charges for the shooting of Chavvy.

 

McDonaldsevelt: "It's Deja Vu All Over Again." Brisbane, 10 September 1943. Australia Weekly. In what some military experts are calling "the actual worst maritime disaster in U.S. history," close to 45,000 American servicemen were killed by the Japanese menace last week. One year to the day after the American navy suffered its first major defeat of this so-called "World War," and just over a year since about 20,000 American marines met their ends near the Marshall Islands, the Imperial Japanese Navy has proven once again that it is the most powerful force on waves. A significant fleet sailed out near the Gilbert Islands on September 6th to pay respects to the sailors and airmen killed in the Battle of the Southwest Pacific on September 6, 1943. After departing from the area around Tarawa, the fleet was ordered to the Caroline Islands for an invasion near the major Japanese naval base of Truk. As the entire USN Pacific Fleet gathered to depart Tarawa, three squadrons of the Imperial Japanese Navy gathered under significant squadrons of fighters and dive bombers from over a dozen carriers, as well as surrounding islands. After 6 bloody hours of fighting, a clear victor had been determined and tens of thousands of American sailors and marines had been killed. Going to the bottom during the Second Battle of the Southwest Pacific included the American carrier Yorktown, the 1st and 3rd Marine Corps, nearly all of the US Navy's lift capacity, nearly 3,000 American fighters and bombers, and American morale. The Japanese lost around 400 airplanes, and succeeded in deterring an American invasion for the foreseeable future. President McDonaldsevelt was seen mumbling to himself over a nearly-empty fifth of bourbon just two hours after hearing of the disaster. "14, 14, 14," the great leader repeated over and over. What could be the significance of this integer?

"Rule Britannia" Given New Title. Whitehall, 21 September 1943. Daily Express. In a move that would surprise nobody familiar with the course of the War of the Pacific and Indian Oceans, the British Crown's exclusive trademark on the song "Rule Britannia" has expired and the Japanese Emperor Hirohito has claimed the song for his own nation. The song, now entitled "Rule Nippon Fleet," tells how the Japanese fleet has now defeated every major force thrown against it. The opening verse, which formerly detailed the origins of the British Navy, now explains how the Japanese came to their present position of power. Each verse ends with the powerful "Rule, Nippon Fleet! Rule the waves; Nipponese will never be slaves." When asked to comment on these changes, PM Galehill had the following to say: "We've never been bothered by losing anything! We've lost Egypt, Ceylon, Malaya, South Africa, Rabaul, Aden, parts of Australia, and someplace called Burma. What difference will the trademark to one song make? We will continue to strategically retreat to the sound of silence, as we have done so many times to the sound of 'Rule, Britannia.' After all, if we played 'Rule Nippon Fleet,' we might be sued by the Emperor and his cabinet." Wise words from a courageous leader.

War News Stops! No One Seems to Know Why - Correspondents Simply Stop Writing!